Friday, October 31, 2008

Why Should You Care About Street Fighter IV?


AHR had the chance to chat with Capcom about Street Fighter IV, touching on everything from what's new to what's old to the ins and outs of Sakura, a fan fave fighter that was just announced as a console exclusive character in the game.

Video produced in co-operation with Pop Culture Shock.

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Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Geekanerd's Halloween Costume Bingo: 2008 Edition

Back by popular demand, a Geekanerd Halloween tradition...


Click on the above graphic to get a full 5x5 card. You'll be taken to our custom-made RANDOM BINGOTRON CARD GENERATOR, where you can generate as many cards as you want.

Now make yourself a good card, print it out, and play against your ghoulish pals at your local Halloween party or parade.

Forget how this works? FAQ after the jump!

Frequently Asked Questions:

How's this work again?
If you see someone wearing a costume on your card, cross out the space. First person to get a row wins.

What if my opponent lies and says he saw something when he didn't?
Both parties have to see the costume, unless you are both unfalteringly honest people.

What if I see a costume I need, but my opponent has it on his game card too, and I don't want him to get the space?
Take a cell phone pic, and show it to your opponent after the costume in question is long gone.

I don't have a cell phone camera.
Can't help you.

Why is Joker the free space? Doesn't that defeat the purpose of a free space?
If you go the whole night without seeing someone dressed as The Joker, your town is either impressively innovative and original or really out-of-it and lame.

What happens if I win?
The loser has to buy you an Incredible Hulk at a local tavern, and you have to drink it.

What if neither one of us ever gets a row?
You should have generated a better card, loser! Whoever has more spaces checked wins.

Why don't you have Sarah Palin/Joe The Plumber/The Olsen Twins/Sexy Nurse on here?!?
This is Geekanerd. We're only interested in geek iconography.

Does Sexy Batman count as Batman? Does a dog ninja count as a ninja? Does Sarah Palin Hermione count as Hermione? Does steampunk Spider-Man count as Spider-Man?
Yes, yes, hell yes, and omg yes. Any and all riffs are fair game (except a non-Nurse Joker doesn't count as a Nurse Joker, cause... It just doesn't).

Is this really an annual tradition?
Yessir. Here's last year's card. As a matter of fact I played last year against my famous girlfriend at the West Village Halloween parade and er, I can't remember who won.


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Barack Obama Hates Video Gamers

If you haven't made up your mind who to vote for in next week's presidential election, you should know that if you play or have ever played a video game Senator Obama wants to redistribute your Wii Points, Xbox 360 achievements and hours of entertainment to people that have never gotten off their lazy butts to play a video game, like, EVER. We as Americans can't stand for this. See the offending moment in context after the jump.


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Monday, October 27, 2008

2008 Dog Costume Contest at Tompkins Square

I wanted to go to this event so badly, but unforutnately the rain date conflicted with the zombie crawl. Cute doggies, or gross zombies? TORN!

So I had to delve into the Flickr pages of strangers to get my dog costume fix. Here are some of the best geek-themed costumes, found on the Flickr pages of jeanacosta, katya323, and mysuspira.


We'll kick things off with my favorite, Oscar the Grouch. Simple, yet effective and brilliant! And I'm sure that dye is non-toxic.

This is a puppy from the planet Earth, but it's dressed up as an Ewok from the planet Endor. Ladies and gentlemen, that does not make sense.

Krypto, Link, The Joker, and more, after the jump!


Supergirl and Krypto, the Superdog.


I'm pretty sure this is Link, not Robin Hood.



Even dogs want to get in on the hottest costume of the year, The Joker! That little dog in the background is like, "iz harley quin?" and joker dog is all, "NO WAI".


Green Doggie Dye must have been on sale this year...here's a little Dagobah-era Yoda puppy.

These next two dog's owners should be sent to the PUNitentiary...



A "Greyhound" bus...


And a "Chick" Magnet. Wa wa waa!


And then there's this little guy, who seems to be saying, "OK, whar is judge table pleez?"

If you're going to dress your pet up in a nerd-related costume, please please send us a picture so we can laugh at it. In a nice way.

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World Zombie Day 2008: Zombie Hunter Edition

The Geekanerd staff has attended past Zombie Walks in full undead regalia, but this time we wanted to cover the event from a different angle. So we hired two dashing zombie hunters to cover the event for us.

It cost us a pretty penny (those guys think they can charge anything) but I think the results were worth it.

They twittered us updates, which we'll post along with photos (some of which they took, but most of which we had to snag from the Flickr accounts of nyczombiecrawl, MissMoll, hesterk, and hellzkeeper ...geez, what did we pay these guys for again?)


zombegone here is a pic of us at clients house bout to go track n hack some zombs 1:25pm


zombegone zombs were gathering at Beauty Bar in manhattan. festive atmosphere. saw one that had walked all the way from hawaii which answers a dollar bet we had on if zombies can walk on the bottom of the ocean 2:15pm


zombegone think we recognized this one. disappeared after new york marathon. still sort of half jogging 2:30pm


zombegon done w recon, startng a sweep 2:41pm


zombegone got the jump on these guys 2:36pm


zombegone good session 2:55pm

zombegone this is something you don't like to see, but it happens 3:30pm


zombegone followed horde to union square - more than expected. price is going up 4pm

zombegon spotted non-com hunter w crowbar. whatev hav fun getting eaten lol4:13

zombegone horde on the move down broadway. definitely more than expected 4:40pm


zombegone saw some zombies wearing 80s clothing. means long-dead are rising. bad sign 5pm

zombegone at astor place now. mobbed glass facade at starbucks. zombies getting rowdier 5:15pm

zombegone zombs in car wtf getng out of hre 5:25pm

zombegone BRAAAAAIIIIJKBKBNMNNSSS 5:41pm

zombegone CCARFRRRRR BBNBRRAAAKIIIINNNSS 6:02pm

zombegoneYYUUUU PAAAY NAAO INNNN BRRRARAIINNNS!111 6:36pm

zombegone KLLL ZZOMMBBBEE HNNTTR 4 BRAISNNS 6:57pm

****

So...yeah. I guess that's just an occupational hazard when you're in that line of work. I mean...kind of unfortunate it happened on a job they were doing for our site but...I mean, I'm sure they knew the risks. And it's probably how they would have wanted to go. Or maybe not. I'm not sure what the psychology is there. Anyway.

Special thanks to Hellzkeeper for sending us a link to their pictures. If you have any shots of these semi-departed heroes, please send them in so the Zom-Be-Gone name may live on. In a tributey way, not an undead way. You know what I mean.

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Thursday, October 23, 2008

Top Ten Rogues Galleries In All Of Geekdom

Surely there are many awesome superheroes; but what makes a superhero truly great? Not his powers, not his costume... but his rogues. You can have the coolest hero with the coolest powers and the coolest costume-but who would give a damn if he or she only fought Captain Lame-o and his goon squad. Here at Geekanerd, we take our villains seriously; they can make or break a hero (ha, sometimes literally!). We also take our lists seriously-so I present to you our TOP TEN ROGUES GALLERIES IN ALL OF GEEKDOM! Also, as an added bonus, the super hero with the lamest rogues gallery... but we'll get to that later.

Firstly, a quick rundown on the criteria. To reach "Rogue" status, a villain needs to plague a hero. No single serving villains here. Secondly, to reach "Gallery" status the villains need to be aware of each other and have some sort of interactivity-whether its a healthy rivalry or the occasional team-up. Alright, enough of the rules, To The List!

#10 Darkwing Duck
First on the list, a cartoon you may have forgotten about-but we here at Geekanerd never will. Not only was this show Disney animated hi jinks at its finest, but it also had the finest villains in your afterschool cartoon lineup. The most common problem with superhero villainy is a painful lack of attention to character personality. Far too often, a villain is simply a vessel for a superhero specifically designed to fight a hero. Same character, different costume. But this Rogues gallery has a varied array of personalities rarely seen in children's tv. With characters like Negaduck, Megavolt, Bushroot, The Liquidator, and Quackerjack; there is no personality overlap. From the willing-to-do-Anything-evil Negaduck to the timid Bushroot (and then of course the bizarre Liquidator who only speaks in TV-ad-speak); its hard to imagine that these characters came from the same studio that gave us the dullest characters ever: Huey, Dewey, and Louie (no no, they're totally different, see? They have different colored hats!)



#9 Freakazoid
This show never gets enough love. Now that it's out on DVD, if you haven't seen it, well you better rectify that. Of course the star attraction is the hilarious and insane Freakazoid-but that doesn't mean his villains don't steal any of the show. The Lobe, Cave Guy, CandleJack, Arms Akimbo, Waylon Jeepers-only a hero as nuts as Freakazoid could deal with this freak show. Some of the funniest moments in all of villainy come from this rogues gallery. The Candlejack episode alone is one of my all time favorites.

Hit the jump for the best Rogues Galleries (and the worst)...




#8 The Venture Brothers
This one may be a bit of a hard sell-most of the villainy occurs off screen in an implied continuity that we are only partly privy to. But, the show takes its villainy very seriously-going to great lengths to create a villainous society with rules, bylaws, statutes and other boring stuff you wouldn't ordinarily associate with villains. And as far as "plaguing" the protagonist goes-you never feel that frustration more than you do on The Venture Brothers-with each attack eliciting hardly more than the lackluster "alright, everyone to the panic room." Of course there's the obvious The Monarch; followed by Dr. Girlfriend (now Dr. Mrs. The Monarch), Baron Underbheit, Phantom Limb, Sgt. Hatred, and even David Bowie... but then you have the implied villainy of The Power Plug, Mecha Mouth, King Gorilla, Mr. Monday, The Intangible Fancy-who knows what any of them did... but you can rest assured that with names like that, their deeds were truly villainous.


#7 The X-Men
Enough funny stuff, let's get down to some serious Superheroics. The first true blue superhero comic to make the list is everyone's favorite team of social outcasts! And their list of rogues is even longer than their ever expanding team roster-You got your Magneto and his Brotherhood of Evil Mutants (who's team roster supplies enough rogues for the Avengers and the Justice League combined), you got your Mr. Sinister, your Apocalypse, your Hellfire Club, your Dark Phoenix, your Sentinels... really, there aren't too many people the X-Men haven't fought over the years. Hell, give Prof. X a nasty helmet and even he'll smash you into a new continuity


#6 Captain Marvel
SHAZAM! *Bonus points if you now what all those letters stand for* Captain Marvel may be a surprise to you, but his villains are all quite memorable-and perfectly fit the pulpy goodness that is Captain Marvel. Each and every one of them could have come out of a pulp magazine from the '20s; Dr. Sivana (the ultimate archetype of your Mad Scientist), Mr. Mind (a planet conquering worm from beyond), Black Adam (a reverse Captain Marvel-getting his powers from those dirty Egyptian gods), and even Captain Nazi (ok, so you would be hard pressed to find him in a '20s pulp mag). Not only are they all great throwbacks to a simpler time, but they've all been given the modern treatment and feature prominently in current DCU affairs. Black Adam is one of my favorite DC characters from the past 2 years!

#5 The Tick
Ok, back to the silly stuff... and it doesn't get much sillier than The Tick. Not the first, but certainly one of the best superhero parodies, The Tick featured an amazing cast of insane villains. Some of my personal favorites include Chairface Chippendale, The Terror (thumbs up to evil!), The Human Ton and his pal Handy, The Evil Midnight Bomber What Bombs At Midnight, and of course The Man Eating Cow. Its hard to go wrong when you've got a guy with a chair for a head, a geriatric nut who punched Teddy Roosevelt, and a cow that eats people.*


#4 Daredevil
Now his gallery maybe the smallest of the bunch, but the strength of its individual members more than makes up for the quantity. Sure, he has a healthy sized stable of regular villains (the Owl, Mr. Fear, *cough* Stiltman), but when you think of Daredevil, you think of 3 villains: The Kingpin, Bullseye, and Elektra. And that's enough. These alone are three of the best villains in the Marvel universe-and their relationships to each other are just as messed up as their relationships to Daredevil... its one bizarre ninja family up in there. And of course Kingpin was originally a Spiderman villain; but when Frank Miller took over Daredevil in the '80s, he stole Kingpin from Spidey's stable and remolded him into the menacing and nuanced crime boss that he is today. Also you'd be hard pressed to find a hero/villain rivalry in comics as heated and violent as the Daredevil/Bullseye relationship... I mean he has killed virtually every woman Matt Murdock has ever loved. That's harsh.


#3 The Powerpuff Girls
Sure, laugh all you want, but few have made better use of their rogues gallery than The Powerpuff Girls. Imbuing incredibly unique and bizarre personalities on their villains, this gallery makes frequent appearances on the show-often not as villains but as villainous bystanders merely inconvenienced by the girls' daring-do. With the likes of Mojo Jojo, Fuzzy Lumpkins, the Amoeba Boys, Princess, and the supremely creepy villain known only as "Him," its hard not to respect the care and creativity that went into crafting these villains. You really know the creators loved these guys-getting particularly impressive mileage out of Mojo and Him. You mock, but I stand by this one-Magneto ain't got nothing on Him. (*insert gay villain joke here*)


#2 The Flash
Here's a rogues gallery that took the concept to its natural conclusion-they've actually "unionized" into a group simply called "the rogues." These guys practically brought the phrase "rogues gallery" from the Pinkertons to comics. And besides being ground breakers, they're also endlessly entertaining. Though technically there are dozens, the main cast includes Captain Cold, The Weather Wizard, Mirror Master, The Trickster, Heat Wave, and The Pied Piper. Though on the surface they all seem to represent the mind numbingly dull gimmicked villains of the golden age-they have evolved far beyond that. Practically defined by their obsessions, this motley crew really represent the working man's villain. They have no dreams of world domination or mass destruction-they simply want to make some money, and to make it fast (ha, Flash pun!) Individually they are pretty unimpressive-but as a band they are not only intimidating, but tons of fun to read. Their personalities mesh perfectly to create a group of begrudging friends defined by an ambiguous "code of the rogues." Even in the current Final Crisis, they opted out of joining the DC villains at large to stick to what they do best... fighting scarlet speedsters and looking for a quick payday.

Now, before we get to #1, we wanted to give you our least favorite Rogues Gallery belonging to a big name super hero. Granted, there are definitely worse galleries out there-but none that belong to such an important hero that deserves so much better... so, here it is:

The Lamest Rogues Gallery: Spiderman
I know we're going to get alot of grief for this one, but hear me out-this isn't just nerd-baiting. He's one of the best and most unique superheroes in comics-so why doesn't he have any unique villains? The Vulture, The Rhino, Dr. Octopus, The Lizard, The Scorpion, The Chameleon, (you see the pattern?) I get it... he's a spider-does that mean he has to fight every member of the damned animal kingdom? Sure sure, there are others, Green Goblin, Hobgoblin, Mysterio, Sandman, Electro... but really are any of them that unique? Their goals and motives are all bland and overused; differentiated by little more than a different gimmick and an alternating rate of maniacal giggles... let's be honest-Green Goblin (his arch nemesis I suppose) is little more than a watered down, flying Joker mixed with a healthy dose of Lex Luthor. I'll give you Venom-he's probably the most unique character in the gallery... but not enough to justify the animal themed, experiment-gone-wrong blandness of the rest of em. Too bad they didn't manage to hang onto Kingpin... he's pretty cool.

Now, with that unpleasantness aside, I give you the best Rogues Gallery in all of Geekdom...


#1 Batman
You can argue with me about any of the other members of this list (as I'm sure you will), but there's nothing you can say about Batman. Its a fact; he has the best Rogues Gallery. You're more likely to convince me that the sun revolves around the Earth. How do you counter and obsessive loner bent on an impossible war against crime? Well, throw some even bigger loons his way! Gimmicks and powers don't define these villains, that's too pedestrian. These characters are defined by their own brand of crazy-enough mental illness to fill the DSM. And what's even more amazing, is almost each character alone would be enough to drag any other rogues gallery to the top of this list... but they belong to one man! Joker, Two Face, Penguin, The Riddler, Scarecrow, Poison Ivy, Clayface, The Madhatter, Mr. Freeze, The Ventriliquist... I mean seriously, its not until you get onto the fourth or fifth floor of Arkham before you start to find villains of questionable merit (the Ten-Eyed man anyone?). I mean, most of these rogues galleries are lucky to have 3 great villains... Batman's got dozens! Sure, Superman can fly and shoot lasers from his face... but you know he's jealous of these badguys while he's busy cleaning up another one of Toyman's big robots. It's too bad Batman is too crazy himself to truly appreciate the brilliance he's "inspired" in his villains.

*Thanks to Johnny Zito for letting us use his awesome Tick Sketch! Milkshake baby! Boom!

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Snap Judgements: Final Crisis #4, Final Crisis: Submit, Daredevil #112 and More

Short comic reviews based on initial, lizard-brain opinions. Arranged from BEST to WORST. Beware some potential spoilers.

Final Crisis #4 gets an A- from DEgan
As much as I'd hate to admit it at this point, I think I'm finally figuring out what's going on-apparently it just all takes place between the panels and between the books. And as begrudgingly as I may admit this, I can't shake the fact that I'm really enjoying these books. It seems Morrison's greatest ability as a writer is to give you stories that make no sense but you can't help but love. And now that we're pretty far along, I'm actually seeing where some of these puzzle pieces land... this thing may end like a season of Wire and leave us all blown away... or it may end like every other crisis event in comic history: disappointingly. Only thing I know for sure-I'm digging out all my past issues of Final Crisis to see what it is exactly that I've missed.

Daredevil #112 gets an A- from DEgan
The last issue left me torn; I wasn't sure how I felt about Matt and Dakota North sleeping together. My first reaction was "ugh, typical." But then, the more I thought about it, the more it actually made sense... I mean, come on, it was actually pretty inevitable; she's a former supermodel detective... he's a crazy loner who's lost every woman he's ever loved...she was just beaten to a bloody pulp... he's, well, a crazy loner who's lost every woman he's ever loved. It was gonna happen. This issue deals mostly with the angsty aftermath-and Matt's reaction is lovably predictable. I'm also kinda digging Lady Bullseye even though she's done little more than lurk in the shadows and watch things happen. You have to give it to Brubaker-I didn't think anyone would be able to follow Bendis' (possibly my favorite single run on any superhero title). But he's doing a great job-still one of my favorite monthly titles. Now, just give me something to review other than soap opera who-slept-with-whom BS.

Reviews for Final Crisis: Submit and the DC Halloween spcial, after the jump...

Final Crisis: Submit gets a B+ from DEgan
Oh look! Another Final Crisis title! God forbid I miss a single one! Sigh, all the attitude aside, its yet another FC title that has me confused and happy. Lucky for me, my friendly neighborhood comic retailer told me to read this book before Final Crisis #4.... as the book ends about 30 seconds before #4 begins. I woulda been double plus-pissed if I had read it the other way around. Apparently freedom of the press is the super hero community's #1 priority in this crisis as both of the books have JLA second stringers running paper boy duties (I saw the opening splash page of Black Lightning running with the Daily Planet Satchel and immediately thought, "ah, Grant Morrison's writing this one too") Also, there are some great black superhero vs black supervillain moments in this book (some comically bordering on the cliched) that made me care more for Black Lightning than I ever have. Now, Mr. Morrison, pull this sucker together!

DC Universe Halloween Special Thing gets an F from AHR
This was the most incoherent piece of crap I've ever read. Seriously. Worst edited book I've ever read. It seems like there might be some fun things in here (Duncan Rouleau's story at least looks interesting), but it's just not worth the head scratching. As happy I was to see the Dibneys back as ghost detectives, their dialogue is embarrassingly bad, to say nothing of all the grammar and punctuation errors. Throw this crap in the trash.

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Wednesday, October 22, 2008

The Five Best Games You Can Download

The greatest achievement of this console generation isn't HD graphics or motion control, it's the downloadable game. Why? The experiences are shorter, which just means whatever good ideas the designer had are more concentrated. The games are cheaper to make, which keeps development teams small and gives the games the chance to be something really special and weird without having to answer to anyone--like an independent film. They are also cheaper to buy, a perk which needs no explanation. And, perhaps most importantly, 2D IS BACK!

Here are five games that probably wouldn't exist if they couldn't be distributed digitally, and thank Jah they exist because they're freakin' awesome!

(Note: Only originals on this list... No Virtual Console, no HD remakes. Oh, and no PC only games, that's a whole other article!)

World of Goo (Wii, PC)
This game is a great-looking (I wish it was HD!) puzzler with a really cool, mysterious mood. The majority of the writing is to be found on signs left behind by a mysterious sign painter, and it's all very clever and intriguing stuff. The gameplay mechanic itself, building structures out of goo balls to reach a goal, probably could have made it into a disc game, but the quirky, low key mood of the whole thing would probably be replaced by something bright and kid friendly (*cough*BoomBlox*cough*) in order to sell more. And honestly, as fun as the puzzles are, without the unique voice and style this game wouldn't be nearly as great.

The other four totally radawesome games after the jump...

Strong Bad: Cool Game for Attractive People Series (Wii, PC)
This game is on this list because of it's breaking ground for licensed games based on relatively niche properties (also see Penny Arcade's game), which just doesn't happen with the huge costs and selling requirements of disc based distribution. Plus, it's a resurrection of a genre I care about very much, the adventure game. AHR loves these, and has some good things to say about them: "These days, I like these games better than the show. I don't mean to slam the show, but the game's humor is sharper, a little meaner, and has significantly fewer self-referencing jokes than the toons. The puzzles are easy but still satisfying, and the new episode has a plot that's fun just to think about; all the citizens of Free Country USA decide to claim their own countries, in the same way that StrongBad owns Strongbadia. This leads to tons of political, historical, and geographical gags, perfect for pseudo-intellectual nerds who will laugh at anything said in a 1940s announcer voice."

Braid (Xbox 360, PC)
This game is the brainchild of one man, Jonathan Blow. With just a few collaborators he's made something beautiful, and as far as I'm concerned games in general could benefit from a shrinking of creative input. What you get here is a focused vision with passion oozing out of every pore. The only real fault of the game could be its pretentious writing, but even that is so earnest and embarrassing that it connected me to the gamemaker rather than distancing me from the game. The puzzles Blow constructed are original and maddening and brilliant and oh-so-satisfying to solve. It's somewhat similar in mood to World of Goo--a kind of mysterious, abstract emotional experience accented by deep, pondering music. The last level is an honest-to-goodness work of art that is a very elegant statement about love, loss, and perspective. That level alone is probably the most exciting gaming experience I've had since the last act of Portal, and honestly could have stood alone.

Echochrome (PS3)
If there's one thing that should scream out to you from this list, it's that downloadable games are turning their collective back on the flashy 3D graphics that have dominated gaming since the N64. Perhaps no game speaks to this as much as Echochrome. This game is technically 3D, but is rendered with no textures in simple black and white lines. The gameplay plays off of the fact that it's a 3D space represented on a 2D plane (your TV screen)--you get a mannequin from point A to point B by rotating the 3D level to make pathways appear to connect from your 2D perspective, like an MC Escher waterfall or whatnot. Elegant game design with a pared-down aesthetic equals a whole lot of win.

Castle Crashers (Xbox 360)
This one seems like it could really be a full release disc game. The basic gameplay is reminiscent of those old arcade beat-em-ups you loved--Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, X-Men, The Simpsons--with a bunch of RPG-lite features thrown in with upgradable stats and weapons. The visuals are delightfully cartoony 2D with excellent character design (especially in the larger bosses), and it's just a blast to forget about much else than running left and right mashing buttons for a change. It's a great group game that anyone can pick up and play, and there are more unlockables than a... MasterLock factory(?), which gives it a ton of replayability. A welcome throwback to a genre of gaming that has all but expired.

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Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Truth in Titling

Glark (tagline: "She's got a tongue like an electric eel, and she likes the taste of a man's tonsils!") created these clever little mock ups of what the title cards of your favorite TV shows would look like if the producers were really being honest with you. These are the most geekanerdy, but there are more good ones over at her site.Thanks to Abby for tipping us to this!

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Monday, October 20, 2008

Panel Discussion: Scans From Mercy Sparx, Amazing Spider-Man, Street Fighter II: Turbo, and More

Every Monday, we at Geekanerd rip panels from last Wednesday's comics and post the best, the worst, and the weirdest. Those who didn't read books last week, beware of SPOILERS.

Beatdown Of The Week - Mercy Sparx #1


Man, we haven't had one of these in a while! But demonic anti-hero Mercy Sparx stole our hearts this week with her repeated blows to the head in her fight against a rogue angel.

Mercy starts things off right with a face punch into a bathroom mirror.

They take it outside, and Mercy doles out a classic knee to the face.

Kick to the head! This girl is awesome.

After Mercy wins the fight and takes the angels halo, she throws in an extra right cross, just because.

The angel defeated, Mercy is forced to end her reign of head smashing. Or is she? Man down! All in all, five different varieties of blows to the head in seven pages. Numbers don't lie, this book is awesome!

Dumb and crazy art, Spider-Man loses it, and the most forced cliffhanger ever, after the jump...


Uh, Yeah... We Got That - Monster Size Hulk
At one point in the story Bruce Banner locks a werewolf in a cage... And in case you aren't perceptive enough to identify a padlock, the artist throws you a bone with a big ugly Photoshop "LOCK" label. Thanks guys.

Most Extreme Foreshortening - Street Fighter II: Turbo #1
I don't really have anything to say here. Just...that is some serious foreshortening. The more you look at it, the more bizarre it becomes.

Dr. Spidey - Amazing Spider-Man #573
Look at what a good job Spidey did administering first aid to himself using webbing as bandages. The only problem? In one hour that dude is gonna start bleeding out.


Worst Cliffhanger - Street Fighter II: Turbo #1

I really loved this book, but I can't resist making fun of it. Do yourself a favor and read this next page...c'mon, it takes place "In Alaska"!

Got that setup? In case you absolutely refuse to click that panel, I'll tell you what Ryu is thinking as he meditates by the fire: "If Akuma shows his face at the tournament for our rematch as he promised, I will be ready to avenge your death, Master...I swear." Got that? Then the door creeeeks open - who could it be???


....wait for it....


OH SNAP.

He Raises a Valid Point - Amazing Spider-Man #573
I imagine it's pretty frustrating to have a villain like Norman Osborn, who can die a bagillion times and still come back to be a big pain in the ass. So it makes sense that Spidey would find it pretty easy to justify breaking his Golden Rule.

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