Those total D-Bags over at ThinkGeek think they have the best April Fools prank ever. Smug assholes. They had to go and taun-taunt us (a-thank-you) with this insanely awesome sleeping bag shaped like a vivisected tauntaun! You would get to sleep in its intestine-patterned innards with your brow resting gently on its adorable tauntaun pillow-head. There's even a lightsaber zipper pull so you can imagine slicing the beast open every night before you go to bed! BUT if you click the BUY NOW button (as any self respecting nerd would) you'll find a mean old "April Fools!" message awaiting you. Quit mocking us and get to work on making this thing a reality! I don't care if I'm a 26 year old urban professional with a fiance! I'd sleep in this thing every night!
With the start of April comes many burnt blogosphere offerings, but the gem of the day was a nerdlicious new song from MC Chris. He'd been advertising an exclusive preview track from his upcoming album, though given the April 1st release date it seemed unlikely he'd be putting up anything legit. He ended up unleashing a song that won't be on the album, or presumably any other album since the backing track consists almost entirely of samples from the greatest Danny Elfman theme of all time...
UPDATE: Aw man, it got taken off YouTube! Oh well. You can still get it off Chris's MySpace, see the link below.
Awesome. It's available to download for free on mc chris's myspace. Annotated lyrics after the jump....
The following lyrics were posted by MC himself on the MC Chris forums and YouTube. Most of the references should make sense to anyone who counts themselves as a fan of the film, but I added a few annotations for some of the more obscure lines.
im deathly pale bad breath bad teeth hate the sand and the sun never see me at the beach i'll stick with goth chicks transfixed on death that wear black britches i insist on nice breasts
i sleep in a grave lived through the black plague actually that's all my fault but dont wiki that k? green hair downstairs boogers farts and phlegm that's my stock in trade see me startin trends
black and white striped suit or a blood red tux got jack on my hat in japan it's a must (1) i can change shapes do pranks and disguises bioexorcist im the best in a cirisis
parents wanted me to clean up like my brother (2) boss used to say i didnt work well with others now im independent and my methods are effective say my name three times if you want to get connected
beetlejuice beetlejuice one two three i like a little lady name lydia deetz her demeanor is depressed i confess that's sweet dont try to deny she's my bride to be
hey kmart shoppers there's a sale on my services im here to help there's no need for your nervousness i'll eat what u wanna eat swallow what u say (3) relieve you of your living that are ruining your day
have you read the handbook for the recently deceased it's too thick like my dick when i think of little deetz she's the key to my release from this model existence coffin lining's confining and i want out this instant
me and the dragster of doom we're the baddest of dudes (4) we hit the inferno room where the ladies get nude but we're eternally screwed so i become a bridegroom and get lovely lydia to lip synch an i do
i must move the maitlands out of my way give'm zipperlips pitch a plate on their face say hello to hammer hands say goodbye to goulet and then off to fla where my review drew raves (5)
shrimp glove face plant we like cassettes not 8 track clown face much like the one you'll see in dark knight being dead kinda sucks the afterlife's no fun to us im the name that people trust the juice that comes from beetleguts
(1) Kay, we're starting off slow because I actually don't really know what the hell he's talking about here. Possibly refers to the Beetlejuice stage show in Universal Studios Japan?
(2) Reference to Beetlejuice's Parents an episode of the Saturday Morning Cartoon show in which it's revealed that BJ's parents are conservative squares.
(3) Refers Beetlejuice's advertising jingle for his bioexorcism service; "I'll eat anything you want me to eat, I'll swallow anything you want me to swallow, come on down I'll....chew on a dog!" Perhaps the film's finest moment.
(4) Another reference to the cartoon, the Dragster of Doom (or Doomie) was Beetlejuice's sidekick from the second season on.
(5) Beetlejuice's Rockin' Graveyard Revue used to be a live show at Universal Studios Florida, but it's gone now, along with the amazing Back to the Future Ride. Kids today have to settle for some seriously tame bullshit based on The Mummy and Twister.
As you may have already discovered when you woke up to find your room swarming with Madagascar hissing cockroaches (apologies to my roommates) it is indeed April 1st, better known to all as April Fool's Day. A day when we play pranks on our loved ones to show them that, well, I guess to show them how gullible they are. Anyway, nobody knows how to prank better than the Geek community. Take a look at this trailer that was posted on IGN and is already making the rounds:
High quality eh? The production team behind it is Rainfall Films, and I must say they did quite a good job with the fx.
More Gnerd worthy April Fools jokes after the jump.
Next up, our friends over at Blizzard. With the new expansion "Wrath of the Lich King" so highly anticipated, Blizzard decided to create a new class to capitalize on the Guitar Hero/Rock Band craze. Introducing, the bard: Link.
Nice one Blizz, though I have to say, that would be a pretty hilariously amazing class to roll.
Youtube is apparently Rickrolling it's own users. If you're not familier with it, Rickrolling is when you purportedly link to something, but the link actually takes the clicker to Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up." Check out any of the Featured Videos on Youtube and prepare to be serenaded by a skinny redhead with the stolen voice of Barry White.
Google mail (or Gmail as it's affectionately known) has created "custom time" as can be seen here. This allows users to backdate their emails to have them appear in whatever chronological order is necessary. Seems silly, but 1 million procrastinating college students just passed out from sheer joy at the cruel joke.
A couple webcomics have also joined the fun, including Dinosaur Comics, Questionable Content, and Xkcd, which have all swapped web addresses to confuse and confound. Of course, since these are all links, you'll have to check the http at the top of your browser to confirm that yes, they all have the wrong addresses. CONFUSION!
That's all for now, be sure to let us here at Gnerd know about any other Gnerd-worthy April Fool's jokes that are going on!
