Snap Judgments - Comic Reviews for 9/19/07

This week we're trying out a new format for our Snap Judgment reviews. Namely, they're way snappier. If anybody has an opinion as to which they like better let us know and we'll probably listen to you. Commence judgment!

Umbrella Academy #1

Only yesterday did I realize the comic world has been waiting with baited breath to see if Gerard Way can write as well as he can wear black eyeliner and sing about cancer. I dug out my Umbrella Academy preview from Free Comic Book day, which I had skipped over in my Owly-induced trance. Well, I loved the FCB ish and this first issue is a joyride as well. It's got a nice darkly comedic attitude, and I particularly enjoyed how the superhero team's father-figure, a wryly detached and somewhat mean-spirited old man. This makes sense because Gerard comes from the world of emo, where all authority must be distrusted and or/sneered at. I kid because I love. Gabriel Ba's art slightly recalls the cartoon-industrial feel of Mike Mignola or Duncan Rouleau, and it's bolstered by Dave Stewart's color palette, so we're talking some very pretty pictures. -AHR

The Verdict: A

The Programme #3

Another month, another recommendation from me to go out and pick up The Programme. I was surprised when I saw that this was only issue three, as the story is so dense it felt like I'd been reading it for much longer. But with this issue things are finally all starting to make sense, and even the difficult but rewarding art is getting easier to digest without losing it's heavy atmosphere. Or perhaps I'm just getting more used to it. Either way, if you aren't reading this yet I heartily recommend tracking down the first two issues and getting to it. -Albo

The Verdict: A-

Robin #166

Robin has been great throughout Adam Beechen's run, although I never got into the most recent on-going plot, namely the saga of Dodge. It's been one of those "annoying wannabe sidekick is rejected only to become an arch-enemy" stories, which can run the risk of either making the hero seem genuinely insensitive or making the sidekick annoying enough to turn off the audience. Dodge was a case of the latter, although in this issue Beechen does a good job redeeming the character, and I have to admit I got a little teary-eyed upon the issue's conclusion. One final nerdpick - in this issue we see Tim Drake cannot play tennis. Bullshit. If the Joker threw a grenade at him and he had to whack it away with a tennis racket, I don't think there would be a problem. -AHR

The Verdict: B

The Irredeemable Ant-Man #12

Last issue seemed to be a perfectly good send off for the series we loved so much. This issue serves not as a conclusion but as a segue into a new iteration of the character that will appear in other Marvel books (it would be a spoiler to say which books...). I seriously doubt I will love the character in another book as much as I liked him in this Kirkman series, so after the satisfying conclusion of last issue this one felt a little like someone resurrecting my dead grandmother and telling me she's gonna work the streets for extra zombie cash. -Albo

The Verdict: C-

SECOND OPINION: Robert Kirkman, no! You said you would never redeem your deplorable non-hero, but in this final outing Eric O'Grady appears to have had a spiritual awakening. It's as if Eric himself knew of his impending cancellation and, fearing the fires of disposed character hell, he felt he had to throw the mea culpas around to save his fictional soul. Still, a disconcerting last issue doesn't erase the fond memories of what has been my favorite Marvel book of the last year. Here's hoping he'll find new fans as a guest-star in other titles. -AHR

The Verdict: A+ for the series, a reluctant D for the issue

Batman/Lobo: Deadly Serious #2 (of 2)

After last issue's questionable merit, I was a little wary to pick this ish up. But I love Sam Keith's art and I figured it'd be worth it just for that. Unfortunately Sam phoned this baby in, with a couple interesting touches doing little to make up for the overwhelmingly bland (and sometimes downright ugly) visuals. The story's a total waste of time, too, so really save your six bucks if you're thinking of picking this one up. -Albo

The Verdict: D-

Green Arrow and Black Canary Wedding Special #1

There are two kinds of events in a comic book. One, the more common one, is where the universe explodes, or someone dies, or is raped, or is slowly lowered into a pit of acid. The other is where someone gets married! This means lots of in-jokes, characters getting page-time with people they'd never regularly get to hang with, and tons of in-jokes. Make the happy couple the two two horn-doggiest members of the JLA, and you also get lots TV-14 rated raunch. Judd Winick manages to keep the tone goofy and light (well, with one notable exception). Even when the requisite big fight scene starts, the madcap comedy keeps rolling right through the cartoon violence. I was disapointed not to see the actual VOWS at this freakin' wedding, but maybe that's for some sort of Green Arrow Black Canary Vow Special, soon to be followed with the Green Arrow Black Canary Feed Wedding Cake To Each Other Special, and the Green Arrow Black Canary Do The Chicken Dance Special. -AHR

The Verdict: A+

Countdown to Mystery #1

Score! I took a chance on this Countdown tie-in solely based on the fact it features Eclipso, who I like simply because the character is currently inhabiting the body of Jean Loring, Ray Palmer's brain-stomping ex who is just my kind of crazy. I didn't realize this issue features two stories, the first of which opens with a shot of the Dr. Fate helmet shooting through the stratosphere like a wayward meteorite and crashing on the Las Vegas strip. That is a good way to open a DC book, and it just gets better from there. The second shorter story is the one with Eclipso, as well as our old, dead friend from Gotham Central (and former partner to Renee Montoya)...Crispis Allen! He's the Spectre's current host (making this book all about mystical entities and the humans they glomp on to, I guess?), and we even get to see him help dole out some patented Ironic Justice. Stephen Jorge Segovia's art for this second story is outstanding, made stronger by Dan Brown's masterful colors. Some of the best art of the week right here, no kidding. -AHR

The Verdict: A

World War Hulk #4 (of 5)

I feel really bad about dishing so many negative reviews this week, but when you walk out of the shop with as many stinkers as I did you have to vent a little. I've known WWH was getting worse since the second issue, so I can't say I was surprised to find this month's installment lacking even more than last month's. The rest of the Marvel Universe has already moved on from this "Mega Event," which leaves the proceedings feeling more and more irrelevant. The stakes keep getting lower (Hulk not killing anyone showed right off the bat that he will one day rejoin the rest of the heroes without consequence), Hulk keeps getting less angry, and even Romita Jr.'s art, which I've been totally into up till now, is getting sloppy. Add to that an inevitable conclusion that has been broadcast since the first issue and you've got yourself one suckbag of a book. -Albo

The Verdict: D+

Panel Discussion: Scans From This Week's Comics

Don't be afraid to click these suckas for hi-res images - also, SPOILERS AHEAD for those who haven't read their books yet.

No Comment Award - Batman/Lobo: Deadly Serious #1
If our heroes our gonna spend their time together engaging in sexual deviancy, we're going to have to take their crossover privileges away...

Clones, Whitey, Beatdowns and more after the jump!

Coolest New Character - Conall the Beetle, Mouse Guard 1152 #1
Learning how the pseudo-feudal world of Mouse Guard works is one of the most intriguing aspects of the book. Last series we learned that the mice use bees like attack dogs, and now we find that beetles can be kept as pets. Awesome! A look at the official Mouse Guard site reveals that this 5-legged fella has both a name and a sad but sweet back story. Petersen obviously likes the little guy, as Conall injects a bit of humor into the above scene by chewing on one of the little Mouse-Stratego figurines.

NAACP's Exhibit A - The Spirit #9
Old Whitey cheating the Black Man out of what's his.

Attack of the Clones Alert - Blue Beetle #17
AHH! POD PEOPLE! Oh, wait, nevermind - it's just the Teen Titans. I realize that Tim Drake and Jaimie are the same age and have somewhat similar haircuts, but look at that panel - they have the same face! Not to mention the fact that Wonder Girl, Supergirl, and Martian Manhuntgirl look like the freakin' Stepford Cuckoos back there. Oy!

The Disney Silly Villain Stamp - Halo: Uprising #1
I cry a little when villains are reduced to comic relief. As I mentioned in my review of this book, I'm not a big Halo player, but... I'm pretty sure the Covenant soldiers don't talk like Homer Simpson.

Best Visual Framing Device - Batman #668
J.H Williams III takes the prize again! This Black Glove Panel vs Bat Panel is so cool and surprising, it makes up for the somewhat confusing sequence of action going on within the panels. Art is not always about functionality, people! The Black Glove is of course the name of the mysterious villain in the current Batman storyline, and this extraordinary splash page makes it clear he's got the, ahem, upper hand.

The James Gorden Sneak 'N' Scare Award - Batman #668
That's some good sneaking, Batman. Bat-Cyclops betta recognize.

Best Calm Before the Storm - In Her Darkest Hour and Mouse Guard: 1152 #1
Two graceful sequences that lull the reader into a sense of calm with their tranquil beauty, only to amp up the action a few panels later. Very well done.

Best Movie Magic - In Her Darkest Hour
Newly discovered artist Fernanda Chiella shows off quite a bag of visual tricks throughout her first published comic, including some nice nice selective-focus panels that mimic the ever popular rack-focus effect in movies.

Beatdown of the Week - Thunderbolts #116
Yoish, this is grisly. Sure, Hellrazor was a little out of line with all his "kid-killer" digs at Penance, but did he really deserve to have his jaw punched off?

Related: More of Geekanerd's Panel Discussions

Snap Judgements - Halo: Uprising, Mouse Guard: Winter 1152, Blue Beetle, Thunderbolts, Batman/Lobo: Deadly Serious

Video Games Make Bad Comics... Don't They? - Halo: Uprising #1

First, a Geekanerd confession. I've only played Halo once, for fifteen minutes, and I sucked at it. So I'm not sure exactly what was running through my head when I picked this book up. Well, I do know what was running through my head: "Either this will be great because it's Bendis/Maleev, who are a great team, or it will suck which won't be so bad because then I get to tell all those Xbiotches their precious series sucks Covenant Needlers." Well, I don't get to say anything to the Xboxers because their series has made its second transformation to the comic book format quite well.

The first issue is bookended with some slightly stale Master Chief action (Maleev has always been better with mood than with action), but the gooey center follows a hotel concierge and a hotel guest escaping from the alien invasion. The writing really reminded me of Bendis' old crime fiction stuff, like Goldfish or some of his short work for Negative Burn. There's a down on his luck nobody who's gotta step up and be somebody, and he's mixing it up with a sexy lady who can handle a gun. Except this time there's Covenant soldiers instead of hackney mobster types. And just when you start to think that the poor bastard is out of his element and should just hide under a table, it becomes apparent that he's about to get a lot more pivotal in the whole dealy-o.

That all being said, it's still a comic book based on a first person shooter, and that can't be good, right?

Great Characters + Bendis in Top Form - Some Silly Covenant Jokes = A-

Mouse Guard: Winter 1152 #1, Blue Beetle #18, Thunderbolts #116, and Batman/Lobo: Deadly Serious #1 after the jump...


Mice-i-cles - Mouse Guard: Winter 1152 #1

Well, it's finally here - the second series of the little book that blew everyone away with its artistry, its epic action, and of course its formidable cuteness factor. Mice with swords! What's not to like? The beginning of the Guard's winter storyline takes a slow approach - after a minor scuffle with a predator, heavy-hitter Saxon remarks, "No swordplay?" Readers may share his disappointment, although that's not so say this book doesn't deliver on the other fronts that made his title so highly regarded.

We join the characters immersed in a bitter winter, and Petersen's familiar small-scale woodland is now rendered in white, purple and blue. A sunrise towards the end of the issue is the visual high point; the sun shines through the frozen thicket in thin splashes of orange, the contrast against the snow is masterful. The scenes featuring the familiar guardsmice works better than the expositionary conversation delivered by the governing characters, but small touches (such seeing the mice keep beetles as trained pets) make every scene worth a second reading. The issue ends with a bang, and indicates why Petersen has frequently referred this second series as a "survival story". It's gonna be a long winter.

Beautiful Snowscapes + An Expanding Universe - A Slightly Slow Start = B+


In With The In-Crowd - Blue Beetle #18

Writer John Rogers is the best at what he does. And what he does is write quickly-paced comics packed with snappy teen dialogue that should impress even the most discriminating Whedon fan. In Blue Beetle #18, Rogers gets to introduce his greenhorn hero to the popular kids - the Teen Titans. Rogers' take on Robin & Co has them sounding smarter and more distinctive than they do on the pages of their own book, and the dynamic between the hardcore Titan heroes and the easily overwhelmed Beetle Bunch offers up more than it's fair share of LOLs.

The story sticks to the standard team-up format - first the heroes fight each other (Jaimie doesn't recognize the Teen Titans?! They live like four states away from Texas!) , then they band together to fight a big baddie. The bad guy is pretty much inconsequential, since the story is in the team-up. Unfortunately, the bad guy is Lobo, and Fans of the Man may be disappointed to see his antics are upstaged by the wonderful chemistry between the two bands of very different heroes. Jaimie and his friends look at the Titans with outsider's eyes, and can't resist asking a few very meta questions, such as why Supergirl would choose to fly around in a skirt.

The only thing that keeps this ish from getting a full fledged A+ is the first few pages. Drawn by David Baldeon and San Davis, the art suffers from a serious case of clonitis - you'd think that between two artists they'd be able to give each character a different face, but sadly it didn't work out that way. Still, this is just an early bump in the road on a trip to Funsville.

Cracklin' Dialogue - Tim Drake and Jaime Are Twins + Mexican Space Launch = A


It's Not Easy Being Mean - Thunderbolts #116

Yaawn. It seems like this book is only exciting every other issue. Last week we saw an amazing fight where Venom ate someone's arm and Bullseye got his ass handed to him. This week we just get some leftover, heated-up plot rehash. Artist Mike Deodato Jr. makes an admirable attempt to distract from the tedium by constantly drawing Moonstone in a sultry close-up, but that doesn't change the fact that all these conversations in Osbourne's office are boring. Or maybe it changes the fact a little. But not enough.

Speedball fans may be interested/horrified to see how low the former hero has been brought, and he has the issue's "big moment" - but even that seems like a lot of noise without much punch. The only part of this book that really got my attention was a surprisingly angsty Venom - nothing brings on the existential torment like the realizing everyone now thinks of you as a cannibalistic space monster.

Office Conversation - Sound and Fury Signifying Nothing + Venom Angst = C


The Title Is So Bad - Batman/Lobo: Deadly Serious #1

Ask me if I love Lobo...
Yes! I adore Lobo, thanks for asking!
Ask me what my favorite Lobo story is...
Lobo's Back! Thanks for asking!
Ask me what my least favorite Lobo story is...
Any of the one-trillion crossover stories that all suck because every single one of them [that I've ever read -ed.] loses sight of the absurdity that makes Lobo a fun character. I'll even go one step further and say that if Keith Giffen ain't writin' it and Simon Bisley ain't drawin' it then it's taking place in the normal DC Universe and it isn't worth reading. Lobo's world is pulsating and alive and disgusting and perverse and violent and colorful. The DC Universe is... Well, it is what it is. Part of what makes Lobo Lobo is he truly is The Main Man of his universe. Everyone cowers in fear from the notorious bastich, and those that don't soon get their insides fed to them. Thanks for asking!

Now, after years of pretending the character was dead to me, I allowed myself to hope that Sam Keith could capture Lobo as well as the Holy Giffen/Bisley team. And he does! Visually. In other respects, not so much. As I mentioned before, the trouble with a Lobo/Superhero crossover story is that they come from two different worlds and it's very hard to be true to both. This story has Batman being his moody self but also trying to be a little silly, and Lobo being his silly self but also trying to be a little moody. The result is a muddy middleground where nobody's anything. Least of all interesting. Which is a goddamn shame because this book looks SO GOOD! Keith has the cartoony grit that Lobo's world demands, and there are some truly killer pages in here.

Thrilling Keith Art - Underwhelming Keith Story - Not My Lobo = C+