Panel Discussion: Scans from Teen Titans #71, Ink #1, and Batman in Barcelona #1

Beatdown(s) of the Week/Burn of the Week - Ravager vs Wonder Girl and Bombshell, Teen Titans #71

Ravager is back at Titans Tower, and this time she's not taking any shit!

First of all we see a rare example of an EMOTIONAL beatdown...

BOOM! Guilt trip in yo FACE, Cassie! Who's the villain now, hmm?

Later on, Ravager manages to depower the treacherous Bombshell, and face kicking ensues!

Oh snap! Apparently depowering works on Amazonian Girl Gods too (???)! But nah, she ain't even worth it, so Rose just says "Tool" and walks out on those tools.

That, to borrow a word from the internet, is called OWNAGE.


The Ol' Alter-Ego Blues - Batman in Barcelona: Dragon's Knight #1
The Alter-Ego Blues is a phenomenon costumed heroes experience when people call their civilian-personas out for being lazy, irresponsible and generally uncaring. IRONYYY! But as far as I know, no one has EVER had the nerve to admonish Bruce by asking, "Would your parents be proud?" It is a GOOD THING this conversation was being held over the phone, because in Bruce's little "..." pause bubble, I imagine his face went from neutral to near-murderous psychopath with alarming distinction.

The Magic of Comics - Ink #1
Ink is by far the best Final Crisis: Aftermath book I've read, and it's made me an instant fan of penciller Fabrizio Fiorentino and colorist Michael DiMotta. These page compositions are fantastic; look at the balance in theses two ultra-widescreen panels. In the top panel, no space is wasted as the Tattooed Man conjures up a barbed wire panel, and in the panel below, that space is used to show the distance the wire has to travel, as well as the tension of how hard TM is pulling to knock one of the thugs right off their feet. The very subtle splash of blood on the thug's leg is a painful reminder or exactly what's going on here.

Later on, a gang killing is played out in five panels on one page, and each one expresses an important dramatic beat; the stab of the knife. The surprise. The realization. The literal gravity of the situation, as the blood drops into frame and the victim drops his bag. The finality of death. This is an amazingly poignant death for a character who is so insignificant in the larger scheme of the book. Take another look at his hands - the way they go from frozen in pain to limp is a sad and beautiful story all by itself.

20% Gratuity - Ms Marvel #39
Hey, 9-11. I see what you did there.

Best Use of a Repeated Panel - Ink #1
Just had to get another page from Ink in here. There are lots of great touches in this inventive and gory page, but the way hostage's look of frozen terror goes from part of the tension to sight gag is my favorite part.

Panel Discussion: Scans from Irredeamable #2, Atomic Robo Vol 3, Power Girl #1 and More

The Magic of Comics - Power Girl #1

I have very little interest in Power Girl or her boobs, but Amanda Conner's art in this issue makes it worth checking out. Not only is the character design and "acting" fantastic, every page is full of excellent and inventive compositions and transitions that really emphasize the sort of storytelling possibilities that separate comics from any other medium. Per example:
Panel 1: Robots approach, Power Girl rears back with a freakin Buick. Panel 2: Robot salad. Fantastic sense of scale and movement....it forces you to bend your mind around the physical (un)reality of actually possessing the ability to whip a car around like a big fly swatter. Superhero comics are meant on a very fundamental level to be awe-inspiring, but once your reader is past the age of 13, it's a hard trick to achieve. These panels did it for me.

Then there's this. No daring feats of strength here, just a freakin' hilarious representation of being assaulted by someone who can't shut up. Great acting all around.


Meta Patrol - Irredeemable #2
So here we find Irredemable's Clark Kent analog tell his Lois Lane analog that he's actually a Superman analog. In an intentional contradiction of genre expectations, instead of reacting with shocked wonder or teary confusion, "Lois" gets really really pissed off, and in subsequent pages runs out of the room and spills "Clark's" secret to everyone within earshot. Jeez, I know this is one of them there "gritty" comics, but what a bitch!

Downer of the Week - Final Crisis Aftermath: Run #1
God, when did the Human Flame become the worst person in the DC Universe? I thought he was just sort of a dumb schlub. But here, he brazenly robs the wife and little girl he abandoned long ago, and gets away in his wife's car, with his daughter's cherished bike still attached to the back! OH MY GOD! Fuck the Martian Manhunter, this is all the reason I need to hope Flame Guy dies in horrible pain at the end of this series.

Downer of the Week 2 - Atomic Robo #1, Vol 3
I'm not trying to bum everyone out this week, but here's another one-panel portrait of despair and sorrow. This writer got too deep into the world of supernatural aliens, and had to destroy all his work for the good of humanity. This grey little panel really captures something about the crushing weight of responsibility. I love that this is the very moment he lets go of the match, the exact moment that the decision is made, and can't be taken back. Comics are full of visual representations that are at once figurative AND literal, and this is a great example of how effective they can be.

DC I Love You, But You're Bringing Me Down

Dan DiDio, you've been made a fool.

SPOILER ALERT for Final Crisis #6 after the jump...


DC Comics, you blew it! You took your best shot at a mainstream press event since Jason fucking Todd, and you blew it!

Remember this?


Sure you do, cause it was big news! The Death of Captain America! A sad commentary on the Post-9/11 world! Collectors item!

Well, this Wednesday, DC went ahead and killed Batman. That's right, they offed Bruce Wayne, good old crazybrain, everyone's favorite agreived sociopathic hero.

This should, by all rights, be big news. Batman is a huge character. Roughly 17 times as popular as Captain America. And now he's dead. People should be weeping. Remember when Superman died? People were horrified. And at this point, what with the Dark Knight, Batman is a BIGGER, more recognizable character than Superman. He is, perhaps, the MOST FAMOUS comic book character in the world.

How did DC manage to kill the most famous superhero in the world without anyone noticing?

Let me count the ways:

1) OBAMA!

Marvel completely pwned DC this Wednesday, and they didn't even have to try. They simply put out a comic in which Spider-Man meets Obama. It's practically a goof, based on the fact that Obama has said on several occasions he collected Spider-Man comics when he was a kid.

And what happened? Lines out the door! 1st and 2nd printing sold out in hours! ebay auctions for hundreds of dollars! I want to give Joe Quesada a gold medal to wear that says "I KNOW WHAT PEOPLE WANT". America is at a major turning point, and people want to see their cool new future prez fist-bump with Spidey! It's called monitoring the national mood, DC, look into it.

2) Batman CAN'T BE DEAD!

Batman isn't dead - we all know Nolan's third movie is coming out in a few years! Plus I could have sworn I just saw him on Brave and the Bold a few days ago. If you told someone on the street that Batman died on Wednesday, they'd react like you told them Santa Claus died on Wednesday. Batman is too big a character to die - what he does in DC is just a blip on the radar of the American public.

Killing Batman in the comics is admitting that no one at DC could figure out how to make people pick up a Batman comic, DESPITE the fact The Dark Knight was seen by every person in American three times.  People who saw the Dark Knight don't want to read about Jason Todd and Tim Drake ("Who??") battling for the cowl.  They want to read about Christian Bale's facinating new "dark" take on Batman!  Talk about EPIC FAIL.

3) DEATH FATIGUE

DC has killed roughly every single one of their characters in the last few years, including:

The Flash
Martain Manhunter
The Elastic Man
The Wonder Twins
The Ventriloquist
All The New Gods

That's like half of the Justice League right there.

4) RESURRECTION FATIGUE

DC has brought back roughly every single one of their dead characters in the last few years, including:

Jason Todd
Stephanie Brown
Barry Allen
Hal Jordan

The result of all this? NO ONE CARES.

5) Batman's death didn't even happen in his own book.

One might hope that the death of Batman would be the result of a long series of events that reflect the life and themes of the caped crusader. That there might be some sort of, I don't know, EMOTION associated with this character's death.

Nope! Batman dies shooting an evil god alien with a space-gun, thus burning his body to a cinder and sending his alternate self to another multiverse, where he will live out his days in suffering. OMGWTFLOL. So is he even dead? How can we have an emotional reaction to something so convoluted? I would hate to write his eulogy.

I would like to close this rant by saying, I love Grant Morrisson. I don't blame any of this on him. I blame the editors at the top who thought it would be a good idea to have Bruce Wayne die at the end of a immensely complicated "Crisis Event" that was clearly a financial and critical failure from the first few months of it's release. Could they not have just bailed out, and thrown a new ending on? Saved the Batman death for later, when maybe it could evoke some sort of emotion in it's readers other than, "That's it?"

The Death of Batman could have been a heartbreaking story. Batman is a deeply sad character who in many ways, I think, has always longed for death. For retirement. For escape. I'm sure his fans can imagine millions of ways that the Dark Knight could have gone out that would have made them cry their eyes out. But that opportunity is gone now, and can never be regained. Even after Bats gets resurrected, there's no death like the first death. They blew it.

Oh well, there's always fanfic.


PS, the title of this post is taken from a lovely LCD Soundsystem Song. Here is a video of Kermit singing it:

Panel Discussion - Scans from Secret Six, Final Crisis: Resist, and House of Mystery

Most Subtle Gore - Secret Six #3
As if living in a crate wasn't enough to make this guy creepy. It took me a moment to even realize what happened in the two top panels. A pretty effectively shocking murder without even showing much blood. To make matters worse, he doesn't even bother to hide the evidence-he just hobbles away with her girly umbrella. That's cold.

Best Ensemble Acting - Secret Six #3
Oh, he's trying so hard to be threatening here... complete with a subtle sideways glance to see if his intimidation is working. Followed by the lightning kicker that seems to have worked on the poor purple bug guy (any clue who he is?... anyone?). Cheetah, on the other hand, couldn't be more bored by the whole affair... even the Tesla coil effect on her hair doesn't seem to faze her.

Most "almost makes you want to be a Furry..." - Final Crisis: Resist

So in the course of a week, Cheetah has traveled from near-obscurity to one-of-my-favorite-DC-villains status! An impressive feat; but with Secret Six and Final Crisis: Resist in the same week, it's hard not to love her. Of particular note is her *ahem* cockiness in the last panel.

Most "Isn't that precious!" - House of Mystery #7
This little guy is almost as cute as the kitty in last week's panel discussion... oh wait-he isn't spewing blood... so that makes him much much cuter! You get em' little guy!

Best Writer's Revenge - Secret Six #3
Upset by the gruesome murder of Kyle Rayner's girlfriend, Gail Simone started a website called Women in Refrigerators almost 10 years ago. Well, now she's the one in charge, and she gets to say whose remains get stuffed into a small space! You go girl! For comparison, here's the original offending panel:
I'm thinking of starting my own website called "Flight Crews in Lockers." For too long, comicdom has been far too cruel to flight crews.

Snap Judgements: Reviews for Secret Six #3, Final Crisis: Resist, and Trinity #23

Short comic reviews based on initial, lizard-brain opinions. Arranged from BEST to WORST. Beware some potential spoilers.

Secret Six #3 gets an A from DEgan
It's great reading a book without a hero in sight-and Gail Simone knows how to give us exactly what we want... lots of villain on villain action. Fighting that is (though there's a fair bit of the loving too, just not in this issue). Another strong issue in what has quickly become one of my most anticipated monthly DC books... and this story arc is already utilizing one of my favorite storytelling cliches: The Roadtrip! Also, its not too often that I'm blown away by the cleverness and unique-itude of a comic book concept, but the reveal at the end of this issue had me giddy. Can't wait for the next issue!

Final Crisis: Resist gets a B from DEgan
I was able to really enjoy FC: Rage of the Red Lanterns; even though it deals with the current Green Lantern continuity which I haven't been following. I didn't need to know the ins and outs of the politics on OA-and they gave us a solid enjoyable issue that stood on its own. Resist, however, is so bogged down in Checkmate continuity that I found it hard to get through. I haven't followed any of checkmate's doings since they were loosely involved in the Bruce Wayne Fugitive story years ago. So I felt kinda lost throughout (and if you've been reading any of my previous critiques of Final Crisis so far, you'll know that I don't need to feel lost anymore than I already do). Now why doesn't this book have a lower grade you might ask? Well, the nonsense between Snapper Carr and Cheetah was so enjoyable that it saved this book from sucking. This is the second book this week in which she's featured prominently; Secret Six being the other (I accidentally typed "Secret Sex"... which is telling considering her shenanigans this issue). I never knew I liked Cheetah before... but if she's given this treatment more often, she'll quickly climb my list of favorite DCU villains.

Final Crisis: Resist gets a B from AHR
I actually just picked this book up from DEgan's stack and flipped through it, but that sex scene was so steamy I have to give it some props. Favorite part: post-coitus, Snapper is reeling from the experience and Cheetah is like, "Yeah, I know, I'm extremely good." I agree with Deeg, more of her, please!

Reviews for Trinity #23 and another take on Secret Six, after the jump...


Trinity #23 gets a B from DEgan
I wish I had realized at the start that Trinity was DC's next weekly comic... I wasn't quite ready for the commitment. But, that being said, this book is a refreshing break from DCs other big continuity events, Final Crisis and Batman RIP. Though those are still enjoyable, I find myself lost most of the time. Trinity, on the other hand, may lack any characters I care about but it delivers on story. I'm never lost and the progression of the story makes sense and feels right throughout. Plus, in a time when DC continuity is under attack by crisis event writing, Trinity flaunts and taunts its continuity at the same time. The only holes in the plot that appear in these pages, are deliberate and cause the characters some delightful consternation. Wouldn't you be really upset if someone you knew for years is suddenly the head anchor for a national news magazine show... and she's always been so... even though she wasn't 10 minutes ago? Yeah. Its also great to see Black Adam again... and he's not happy about his continuity changes... he's smashing demons demanding to know why he's fighting them. Pretty funny stuff. So although its missing the characters I loved from 52, its giving me a far more coherent and enjoyable story than either of DC's previous weekly comic attempts.

Secret Six #3 gets a C from AHR
The first Secret Six miniseries is one of my favorite comic runs of all time, but I'm not quite feeling this. I thought this would be a rollicking road trip with bullets flying every whichaway, but these issues have felt slow. Too much plot, not enough of the casual interaction between the six that I like so much. I love these characters, but they feel a little stale...Ragdoll's disturbing non-sequitors are fun, but a little repetitive. I'm probably just mad because Knockout died, destroying one of my favorite comic couples. I'll stick with this comic, but I really hope the pace picks up.

Panel Discussion - Scans From Astonishing X-Men, Rage of the Red Lanterns, Joker HC, and More

Celebrity Casting Corner Pt. 1 - Astonishing X-Men: Ghost Boxes #1
Never have I seen better ringer for Ed Harris than Inspector Slipper from this steampunky X-Men tale. And well cast, I say--the man's got quite a face. As fun as it is to spot celebrity likenesses in comics, the excitement is multiplied big time when you can find the exact image the artist used as reference!

Cute OverloaaaAAAHHH OH GOD NO - Final Crisis: Rage of the Red Lanterns #1
My goodness. What is going on at the DC Offices? Did their medical plan stop covering anti-psychotic perscriptions?


A Moral Confusion - Avengers: The Initiative #18

Why is it that all of these superheroes that "don't kill" have no problem exploding Skrulls all over the place? Because they aren't from Earth? Because they have wrinkly chins and green skin? Seriously, they don't even look that different from humans... It makes me very uncomfortable in a very political way.

Achievement In Joker Creepiness - Joker

How do artists keep finding ways to make the Joker seem creepy? Lee Bermejo has him dig into a plate of shrimp the same way he does everything...with perverse, life-threatening glee. *shudder*


Celebrity Casting Corner Pt. 2 - Kick Drum Comix #2
It's nice to see that EVE is getting some work post-Wall-E. It must be hard out there for old cartoon characters, sitting around waiting for direct-to-DVD sequels and crappy movie tie-ins and praying for another Roger Rabbit.

Futurama Alert! - The Avengers: Initiative #18
Well don't these wisecracking heads in jars look familiar! Any Futurama fan should be looking around for Nixon.

A Fitting Weapon - Joker
Only the Joker would think that sticking shards of glass in his fingers so he could razor slap people is a good idea.

Best Use Of A Repeated Panel - Final Crisis: Rage of the Red Lanterns #1
Okay so this is not exactly a repeated panel, but the fact that everything in the panel remains the same except for the head exploding really hightens the sense of surprise in this split second turn of events. In other news, we're all very upset that fuzzyhead Green Lantern didn't make it out of this issue. He was our favorite.

Best Case of Hat Hair - Joker
How frustrating for Harley Quinn that she can't put that Jester hat on without looking like this until her next shower.

Best Acting - Bot-E, Kick Drum Comix #2
She just does surprise so well!

Snap Judgements: Final Crisis #4, Final Crisis: Submit, Daredevil #112 and More

Short comic reviews based on initial, lizard-brain opinions. Arranged from BEST to WORST. Beware some potential spoilers.

Final Crisis #4 gets an A- from DEgan
As much as I'd hate to admit it at this point, I think I'm finally figuring out what's going on-apparently it just all takes place between the panels and between the books. And as begrudgingly as I may admit this, I can't shake the fact that I'm really enjoying these books. It seems Morrison's greatest ability as a writer is to give you stories that make no sense but you can't help but love. And now that we're pretty far along, I'm actually seeing where some of these puzzle pieces land... this thing may end like a season of Wire and leave us all blown away... or it may end like every other crisis event in comic history: disappointingly. Only thing I know for sure-I'm digging out all my past issues of Final Crisis to see what it is exactly that I've missed.

Daredevil #112 gets an A- from DEgan
The last issue left me torn; I wasn't sure how I felt about Matt and Dakota North sleeping together. My first reaction was "ugh, typical." But then, the more I thought about it, the more it actually made sense... I mean, come on, it was actually pretty inevitable; she's a former supermodel detective... he's a crazy loner who's lost every woman he's ever loved...she was just beaten to a bloody pulp... he's, well, a crazy loner who's lost every woman he's ever loved. It was gonna happen. This issue deals mostly with the angsty aftermath-and Matt's reaction is lovably predictable. I'm also kinda digging Lady Bullseye even though she's done little more than lurk in the shadows and watch things happen. You have to give it to Brubaker-I didn't think anyone would be able to follow Bendis' (possibly my favorite single run on any superhero title). But he's doing a great job-still one of my favorite monthly titles. Now, just give me something to review other than soap opera who-slept-with-whom BS.

Reviews for Final Crisis: Submit and the DC Halloween spcial, after the jump...

Final Crisis: Submit gets a B+ from DEgan
Oh look! Another Final Crisis title! God forbid I miss a single one! Sigh, all the attitude aside, its yet another FC title that has me confused and happy. Lucky for me, my friendly neighborhood comic retailer told me to read this book before Final Crisis #4.... as the book ends about 30 seconds before #4 begins. I woulda been double plus-pissed if I had read it the other way around. Apparently freedom of the press is the super hero community's #1 priority in this crisis as both of the books have JLA second stringers running paper boy duties (I saw the opening splash page of Black Lightning running with the Daily Planet Satchel and immediately thought, "ah, Grant Morrison's writing this one too") Also, there are some great black superhero vs black supervillain moments in this book (some comically bordering on the cliched) that made me care more for Black Lightning than I ever have. Now, Mr. Morrison, pull this sucker together!

DC Universe Halloween Special Thing gets an F from AHR
This was the most incoherent piece of crap I've ever read. Seriously. Worst edited book I've ever read. It seems like there might be some fun things in here (Duncan Rouleau's story at least looks interesting), but it's just not worth the head scratching. As happy I was to see the Dibneys back as ghost detectives, their dialogue is embarrassingly bad, to say nothing of all the grammar and punctuation errors. Throw this crap in the trash.

Panel Discussion: Scans From Detective Comics #849, The Walking Dead #53, The Man Who Loved Breasts, and More

Beatdown of the Week - Detective Comics #849

Here's one of the most brutal Bat-interrogation scenes I've ever seen, and it's not even in a Frank Miller book!

Scarecrow has made the mistake of coming between Batman and the secret to saving Catwoman's life, and Batman takes his questioning techniques out of the realm of "intimidation" and into the realm of "black ops torture". As this splash panel illustrates (get it? SPLASH panel? Sorry.), Batman dunks Crane's head in a toilet along with a live electrical wire for some highly unorthodox shock therapy. This gruesome display impresses even the king of electrical torture himself, the Joker. Those two are really just soul mates at heart.

Production placement, zombies, and awkward tastes in porn, after the jump...

Product Placement Alert - Final Crisis: Revelations #3
Oh noes! The citizens of Gotham are driven to such nihilistic despair by the Anti-Life equation, they'll even stomp all over the new pink iPod shuffle! God, why?

Bad Idea Jeans - Walking Dead #53
This also fits into the "Best Use of a Repeated Panel" category.

For those not in the loop, for the past few years worth of issues Rick and his band of survivors have been doing battle with a town full of crazy murderous hicks, and were eventually driven from their safe house, with Rick and his son being the only survivors. Now Rick realizes that if he'd just stayed put with another group of folks he decided to split with back at the beginning, everyone (including his wife and baby daughter) would be safe and sound. What's that crushing regret taste like, Ricky Boy?

Something Horrible Is About to Happen - Crossed #1
This poor bastard got it in his mind that zombies (or whatever these guys are) hate salt, so when his wife breaks her ankle while on the run and tearfully BEGS him to shoot her and save their daughter he just makes a little salt circle and insists "It's going to be all right." The double page spread that follows is one of the most upsetting I've ever seen. We've posted some gory stuff here on G'nerd, but I just couldn't bring myself to post a picture of... the weak stomached should move on to the next panel... a woman being raped, the skin falling off of her scalp, cursing her husband ("Stupid c***sucker f***ing ***hole look what you did mother****er look what you f***ing did"), who is also being raped while his entrails are shown to him, and above it all their young daughter being pulled to pieces. Yeah, apparently zombies don't mind a little salt with their meat. It's more than a little much, even for Garth Ennis.

How Can I Put This... - The Man Who Loved Breasts
Classic sketch comedy, this guy is trying to tactfully explain to a sperm bank employee that he prefers amputee porn.

Movie Moment - Detective Comics #849
In the grand tradition of Luke's Failure At The Cave, Batman has met the enemy, and it is him. HUSH IS BRUCE WAYNE!

jk jk lol, it's still Tommy Elliot, just with some facial reconstruction to make him look like Bruce. But when I first saw this page, I actually exclaimed, "Whaaaaaaaaaaaat!". And that's really the kind of reaction I look to get out of comics.

Snap Judgments: Reviews for Crossed, Detective Comics, Final Crisis and More

Short comic reviews based on initial, lizard-brain opinions. Arranged from BEST to WORST. Beware some potential spoilers.

Detective Comics #849 gets an A+ from Degan and an A from AHR
Man, Dini knows how to write a Batman story. Despite having the least to do with the "overall" (if there is one) R.I.P. story, this has been favorite of the bunch. Breathing life into a dull, manufactured character, Dini has not just made Hush tolerable, but actually intriguing. And Nguyen is quickly becoming one of my favorite current artists. To top it all off, the story ends with one of the most genuine "hows-he-gonna-get-outta-this-one" cliffhangers I've read in a while. -Degan

I continue to love this series. Hush's backstory gets more satisfying with every issue, and the extent to which this issue connects to long past issues in Dini's run of Detective is spellbinding. There's also a ridiculously cracked out Joker scene, even if it only amounts to a cameo. Teaser: Batman busts into Joker's cell at Arkham, pushes him on to the bed and handcuffs him to a pipe. I think I read a fanfic like that once. Um, just kidding? Sorry everyone, but they say context is for the weak. Anyway. This is a great issue in a great story, and it's going to make an even better trade. Can't wait for the conclusion. -AHR

Reviews for Pulp Tales, Crossed, Final Crisis Revelations, Green Arrow and Black Canary, Walking Dead and Young Liars after the jump...

Pulp Tales: Josh Medor Benefit Comic gets an A from Albo
Pulp adventure for those with short attention spans, this book is made up of five four-page standalone stories. And they are tasty little nuggets of pulpy goodness for sure. I want to read more from every one of these universes. The real crown jewel here, though (and the reason I picked the book up in the first place), is a short story by Steve Niles that has more meat than the others. Because while they say a picture is worth a thousand words, four pages of prose sure can pack in a lot more story than four pages of comics.

Green Arrow and Black Canary #13 gets an A- from Degan
This book has been one of my surprise favorites from the start. Each week I'm pleasantly surprised-and this issue is no exception. It does suffer from the usual cathartic first-issue-after-major-story-arc problems... but even then the catharsis was well deserved and well appreciated. Winick continues to make the bizarre arrow family humorously dysfunctional-and this issue even has an "I have HIV" moment that doesn't come off too very-special-episode.

Final Crisis Revelations #3 gets a B from Degan and a B from AHR
Like almost all of these Final Crisis books, I like this story-but it leaves me with no understanding of what's actually happening in the crisis. Like the other titles, this book seems to make reference to events from other titles... but for the life of me I don't know when and where they happened! And I've been reading every Final Crisis title! WTF?! To make matters worse, the art was downright confusing at times, leaving me to carefully analyze certain panels to understand what happened. Aside from all that (like that's not a big deal) I actually really like this story-the Spectre, the Question, Vandal Savage as Cain... pretty awesome story. Too bad there doesn't seem to be a bigger picture. -Degan

This book is loco! Speaking as one who ISN'T reading any other Final Crisis titles, I can just about understand what's going on, despite Rucka's best attempts to confuse me by loading the story up with scripture (both biblical and imagined) at every turn. But despite some mildly heavy-handed theologizing, for the most part this look at the nature of God's mercy through the eyes of a bunch of DC supes is genuinely interesting, and a little heart-wrenching if you were a fan of Gotham Central and the old MCU team. I can't imagine how this book ties into the DC universe at large, since it's basically suggesting the entire world except Montoya and three nun-killers have become scary anti-life demons, but continuity aside, it's heady apocalyptic fun. -AHR

The Man Who Loved Breasts gets a B from Albo
Three short comics from Robert Goodin, the first about a man in the 50s who was told to "do what he loves" so he becomes a custom brassiere maker. Things take a turn for the worse in the 60s, unfortunately. The second is about a guy trying to tactfully ask for amputee porn at a sperm bank, and the last is a conversation between a modern day geek and King Arthur. The last is a great little idea that I've pondered before--if I went back in time, I could tell all the people about all the wonderful things to come, but could I replicate them? Or even explain them? No way! As much as they'd love to hear about cars or gunpowder or antibiotics or radio, it would all be a bunch of talk. Goodin proves he's a skilled cartoonist and an excellent storyteller with this little book.

Walking Dead #53 gets a B from AHR
Wow, something actually happened in this book! I hate to be one of those fans who complains about the slower issues used to build dramatic tension but...I was really starting to get a little tired of the lonely adventures of Sick Depressed Man and Son. Here Rick meets up with old friends, and realizes a major decision he made in his self-proclaimed role as leader was majorly wrong. I've always felt a little antagonistic towards Rick; decent as he is, his alpha-maleness always seemed to come too easy. It's a great choice to take him out of his role as leader, if only for a little while.

Crossed #1 gets a C from Albo
Is there room for another zombie book on the shelves when Kirkman's Walking Dead is still so good? Moments of extreme shock value are the only thing that make this book stand out.

Young Liars #8 gets a D from Albo
I stood by you for eight issues, David Lapham, but I can't do a ninth. I still just don't care what happens to these people, due in no small part to the scattered storytelling style you've slapped on the book. Please go back to Stray Bullets!

Panel Discussion: Scans from Wolverine: Saudade, Welcome to Hoxford, Final Crisis and More

A Note on Blades - Wolverine: Saudade
There've been a lot of interpretations of Wolvie's claws over the years, some better than others, but I gotta say this one really works for me. They remind me of time before it was "revealed" that he has had bone claws since adolescence, or even before it was "revealed" that the claws were an unforseen byproduct of the adamantium lacing process. These finely crafted, downright designed sumbitches remind me of those glorious days when Wolverine was an unfortunate Canadian mutant who was made into a living weapon by mysterious people for a mysterious purpose. *Sigh* Those were the days. Let's see some more of these beauties.
Awesome! So dangerous!


Best Pop Culture Reference - Runaways/Avengers #1
Haw. She said a Harry Potter thing.

Best Deal With The Devil - Amazing Spider-Man #571
So apparently Spidey's deal with the devil that made everyone in the world forget his secret identity also made it impossible for anyone to use an ounce of brain matter to rediscover the fact. Norman Osborn, actual GENIUS, finds Peter Parker's camera set up to take pictures of Spider-Man to sell to the papers, and comes to the conclusion that Peter is just a front for Spidey's side career as a photographer. Gah!


Cute Overload - Welcome to Hoxford and Patsy Walker: Hellcat #3

This was a good week for mice in comics.

First up we got a li'l rattie who comes to speak to psychotic serial killer Raymond Delagdo in the voice of his dead mother. I love the cartoony silloutte in the third panel. Things don't end well for this rat, but at least he had his moment in the sun.

Meanwhile, in Hellcat, this truly adorable snow lemming shows up to guide our hero to...something, I didn't really read this issue, I just tuned in for this adorable ball of cuteitide.

I HAS A CAREER; IZ A BOUNCER. U FOLLO NAO, KTHXBYE.

I also can see the headlines now; "Area Cute Thing Bites a Thing, Is Chubalicious". "Chunktastic Mouser Seen Hanging In There, Baby".

Too Much Information - Wolverine: Saudade
Oh, man. That's just a bit more of Wolverine than I really was hoping to see today. But what the hey, the ladies seem to love it:

Scariest Panel - Welcome To Hoxford #2This is some serious nightmare shit, right here. The way that the monster is holding the woman's glance THROUGH the door is the scariest part. He knows where she is, and he's a' comin.

Whammy of the Week - Runaways/Avengers #1
Whoo doggies! That's how I like my power bolts; all Dragon Ball Z'ed out and in full technicolor, complete with a unique and persuasive sound effect. I also like to imagine what swear word she's screaming, especially in light of the All Star Batman & Robin fiasco.

Most Unpleasant Panels of the Week - Young Liars #8
I'm not going to try to explain to you what's happening here. Not because you won't understand it, but because I don't want to understand it.

Banana Randomizer Award for Achievement in WTF - Final Crisis: Revelations #2
Good lord; so if Batwoman had her own series, is this the sort of adventures she'd be having? I don't know if my sensory perceptions could take it. I can barely parse out what's going on in this one panel, let alone a whole book.

After very careful inspection, I count three guys, five submachine guns, a lot of debris, and I guess that's Croc at the bottom? Or possibly an actual crocodile? I think with more balanced coloring this might have been a coherent but still crazy splash page, but as it's a big black, red, and green blob.