Showing posts with label crazies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label crazies. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Stormtroopers Are Part of a Balanced Breakfast or: The Horrible Truth About Ewoks

No, this is not a real cereal, and yes, those are plastic Lego Star Wars stormtrooper heads. But if you put this in front of me on a Saturday morning, yes, I would still try to eat it.

On a related note, the sight of disembodied stormtrooper heads has made me realize something disturbing about the original trilogy:

I'm sure you recall the shot from the Return of the Jedi finale/Ewok Party Montage where an ewok is playing xylophone with a row of empty(?) stormtrooper helmets. While funny, I've always found this to be a discordantly morbid joke for this scene. I mean, it's all well and good to celebrate the defeat of your enemy, but defiling their corpses in such a zany way should probably fall under the New Republic's definition of war crimes.

Of course, it's not like our humanoid heroes who are responsible for this breach of the rules of engagement, it's those damn ewoks. This is what lifted the scales from my eyes and made me realize the horrible truth about what happened to the Imperial soldiers captured on Endor. For what did the ewoks do with Luke and Co when they captured them? They tied them up and got ready to cook them. I say, to cook them. Do you see where I'm going with this? The ewoks feast upon the flesh of their enemies. THEY EAT. PEOPLE. Jesus Christ. Those helmets are empty because the ewoks ate, THEY ATE, their P.O.W's! Look at that picture of the Stormtrooper Cereal again, and realize this is probably not far from what the ewoks were eating for several weeks after the Battle of Endor.

Thanks to Gnerd reader and food blogger Lena for the tip!
Via SeriousEats via Unique Daily.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

KANGAROO RATS FROM SPACE! EVERYBODY PANIC!


Did you know there are Giant Kangaroo Rats from and in outer space?! Well apparently SOMEONE did because a bunch of scientists just developed the technology to spy on them with a satellite, which is required because these rats are FROM SPACE.

So only NOW have we decided to launch a full scale surveillance initiative on these things? For all we know they could have laser eyes, or telepathy. And exactly how Giant are these guys? There's nothing in that picture that indicates scale. I fear for this planet, I do.
I am glad, however, that if we are in fact on the brink of an alien invasion, at least our future overlords are adorable and therefore very likely to be kind and generous leaders. Space Rat/Space Rat in 08!

Via the crack reporting team of Wonkette.

Monday, June 25, 2007

Tesla Coil Plays Mario Music

Some crazy crazies have set up a rather large Tesla coil in their backyard and programmed it to play the underground theme from Super Mario Brothers. Oh, and to shoot bolts of lightning in the general direction of party guests.

Watch the video at Rocketboom.