Panel Discussion: Scans from Batman, Hack/Slash, Secret Invasion and More

Most Surprising Revelation - Batman #682
Who's that dapper momma's boy? Why it's that nice billionaire fellow, Bruce Wayne. You know, the gentleman that nothing bad ever happened to? In this alternate universe fantasy, we see that without the traumatic murder of his parents, Bruce Wayne would be...Clark Kent.

Disappointing sex, questionable cameos and rats... Lots of rats... After the jump.

Most Disappointing Sex Scene - Hack/Slash #18
The character design in Hack/Slash is one of the series' most endearing qualities. The girls have tons of personality, and resemble real people a lot more than most comic girls. And they're super cute.
So, imagine my delight when our bi-curious heroine Cassie finally decides to go all the way with her lesbian pal. HAWTHAWTHAWT! BRING IT ON!
Annnnd....what? This issue was actually drawn by regular Emily Stone AND backup artist Kevin Mellon, the latter of which ended doing all the sexy stuff. And unfortunately, his art is generic and totally ices the heat that should be emanating from this long awaited scene.

Cameo Alert? - Hack/Slash #18
So in this week's issue of Hack/Slash, one of the characters is attacked by a bunch of characters from...something? I see the Toxic Avenger, someone who really looks like the Amazing Wolfman, something that kind of looks like Spawn...um...the House Bunny....and some sort of weird Scud knock-off? Milk & Cheese show up later, are any of these other guys real characters?

Asking Too Much... - Secret Invasion #8
Alright, so the end of Secret Invasion puts Norman Osborn in charge of everything. He's the new Tony Stark, the leader of the Avengers and the Initiative. Ok... Everybody who's anybody knows this guy is the Green Goblin! Suspension of disbelief is one thing, but this is just ridiculous storytelling!

Creepiest Moment - Amazing Spider-Man #579
The setup here is that a bunch of people are stuck in a dark subway tunnel, and Spider-Man is pulling them up a shaft all at once and there's only one light and even though Spidey is making all sorts of troubled noises he insists the light be kept on the people he's rescuing. When they finally find another flashlight and shine it his way, we find out why he's been grunting so much. Ew.

Somebody Call PETA - Amazing Spider-Man #579
In follow up to the previous panel, Spidey kills all the rats by activating the Shocker's vibraglove (or whatever that thing's called... vibraglove sounds like a bachelorette party gag gift).

Can I Just Say Again... - Amazing Spider Man #579...how much I love Marcos Martin's Spider-Man art? I can? This is my blog? Ok, good.

Somebody Didn't Get the Memo - Iron Man / Hulk / Fury #1
Looks like whoever drew this movie tie-in didn't get the memo that Terrence Howard is out and Don Cheadle is in as Rhodey.

Panel Discussion: Scans From Mercy Sparx, Amazing Spider-Man, Street Fighter II: Turbo, and More

Every Monday, we at Geekanerd rip panels from last Wednesday's comics and post the best, the worst, and the weirdest. Those who didn't read books last week, beware of SPOILERS.

Beatdown Of The Week - Mercy Sparx #1

Man, we haven't had one of these in a while! But demonic anti-hero Mercy Sparx stole our hearts this week with her repeated blows to the head in her fight against a rogue angel.

Mercy starts things off right with a face punch into a bathroom mirror.

They take it outside, and Mercy doles out a classic knee to the face.

Kick to the head! This girl is awesome.

After Mercy wins the fight and takes the angels halo, she throws in an extra right cross, just because.

The angel defeated, Mercy is forced to end her reign of head smashing. Or is she? Man down! All in all, five different varieties of blows to the head in seven pages. Numbers don't lie, this book is awesome!

Dumb and crazy art, Spider-Man loses it, and the most forced cliffhanger ever, after the jump...


Uh, Yeah... We Got That - Monster Size Hulk
At one point in the story Bruce Banner locks a werewolf in a cage... And in case you aren't perceptive enough to identify a padlock, the artist throws you a bone with a big ugly Photoshop "LOCK" label. Thanks guys.

Most Extreme Foreshortening - Street Fighter II: Turbo #1
I don't really have anything to say here. Just...that is some serious foreshortening. The more you look at it, the more bizarre it becomes.

Dr. Spidey - Amazing Spider-Man #573
Look at what a good job Spidey did administering first aid to himself using webbing as bandages. The only problem? In one hour that dude is gonna start bleeding out.


Worst Cliffhanger - Street Fighter II: Turbo #1

I really loved this book, but I can't resist making fun of it. Do yourself a favor and read this next page...c'mon, it takes place "In Alaska"!

Got that setup? In case you absolutely refuse to click that panel, I'll tell you what Ryu is thinking as he meditates by the fire: "If Akuma shows his face at the tournament for our rematch as he promised, I will be ready to avenge your death, Master...I swear." Got that? Then the door creeeeks open - who could it be???


....wait for it....


OH SNAP.

He Raises a Valid Point - Amazing Spider-Man #573
I imagine it's pretty frustrating to have a villain like Norman Osborn, who can die a bagillion times and still come back to be a big pain in the ass. So it makes sense that Spidey would find it pretty easy to justify breaking his Golden Rule.

Snap Judgements: Reviews for Walking Dead, Captain Britain and MI13, DC Universe: Decisions and More

Short comic reviews based on initial, lizard-brain opinions. Arranged from BEST to WORST. Beware some potential spoilers.

Amazing Spider Man #572 gets an A from Albo
Dan Slott and John Romita Jr. continue to deliver an awesome, classic Spidey story. This ish has Norman Osborn getting even more unstable, and even trying on his old Goblin duds. They still fit! And speaking of old costumes, Mac Gargan (the new Venom) slips back into his old Scorpion outfit to create a terrifying Scorpion/Venom amalgam. These developments plus the trashing of New York in their hunt for Spidey makes me feel like pretty soon the feds are going to notice that their team of "heroes" are actually just the new Sinister Six. So good.

All Star Superman #12 gets an B+ from AHR
This book has tons of great moments. Lex is a such a wonderfully brilliant-yet-oblivious bastard in this book, and his brief super-powered reign of terror is a pleasure to read. But this book just wraps up so damn fast; no mention of the Bizzaro plotline, or the insane meta-bottle universe that was actually Earth Prime (or something)? I wanted more of this book, and it bums me out that the incredible mythos Morrison created will likely dead-end with this miniseries, unless of course....there's a sequel....

Reviews for Captain Britain and MI13 #5, DC Universe: Decisions, and The Walking Dead #52 after the jump...

Captain Britain and MI13 #5 gets a B from Albo
While Captain Britain bores the pants offa me, the supporting characters of this book are worth reading. The Black Knight and Faiza make this issue worthwhile, in a scene where they are trying to get the blessing of Faiza's conservative Muslim parents for her new life as a superhero. Black Knight's attempt to ingratiate himself by speaking their language backfires when Fiaza's dad points out that the Knight picked up the language while fighting in the Crusades. Anyway, great stuff. Blade's there, too, but probably not for long so don't let that turn you off of this solid book.

DC Universe: Decisions #1 gets a C from AHR
I thought between a smart writer like Bill Willingham and the aggressively-progressive Judd Winick, this book might actually be a political satire. Nope! The politicians are cardboard stand-ins with no real-world counterparts, and they exist in a completely bloodless political landscape. The Republican nominee is a black woman, and yet the JLA is shocked, SHOCKED, by an assassination attempt...who could imagine a motive for such a crime? And indeed, the perpetrator is being mind-controlled, no doubt by some villain with some sort of non-partisan world domination scheme. We're coming up on the most important election of our lives, if DC wants to cash-in on the hype, can they please grow some balls first? All that said, the JLA interaction is funny and fun, even though Ollie looks like a dumb pushover, that's pretty much par for the course.

The Walking Dead #52 gets a C from AHR
This issue is a perfect example of why this book needs to be read in trades. Some interesting things happen, the writing is good as always, but it's so damn short! There's no satisfaction in reading a detailed, deliberately paced story like this in 30 second bursts. It's not the book's fault, the fault is in comic companies business model that makes everything a serial. C'mon Kirkman, you're in charge now, cut out the middle man and release these as trades! Please?

Snap Judgments, "And We're Back!" Edition: Amazing Spider-Man, Buffy Season Eight, Secret Six and More

Short comic reviews based on initial, lizard-brain opinions. Arranged from BEST to WORST. Beware some potential spoilers.

HOO, that was one INTENSE labor day weekend! Also, we've been moving into a new Geekanerd HQ, and you know, these things take quite a bit out of you. And by you I mean us.

Amazing Spider-Man #570 gets an A from Albo
Good old fashioned comic-booking from Dan Slott and John Romita, Jr. Nothing's being reinvented here, no concepts of what a comic can be challenged... Just a great lookin' story about Spider dealing with two Venoms. Seeing Eddie Brock getting into action again sure is exciting, and hints about Menace's real "deal" and an imminent showdown with Bullseye guarantee I'll be hanging on until this story is up and Slott/JRJR get swapped out for a lesser team (no offense to the next team, I haven't actually looked up who it's going to be.)

Detective Comics #848 gets an A from AHR
I can't believe I'm so excited about a Hush "event" story, but Dini's made him such an engaging character. More pieces of his slightly Norman Batesy past come to light, and we finally get a chance to see him put that medical degree to some truly horrific use. Throw in a surprising link to one of Dini's rising star villians, and this is a serious page-turner with great art to boot.

Secret Six #1 gets a A- from AHR
I loved the last series of this title with a passion, and this issue promises to continue the fun. Great setup for a wacky roadtrip plotline, a new gross and awesome villian, and a Batman tie-in! All the pieces are here for a kickass run, though I personally was hoping for a few more hillarious scenes with between the six (or four, as the case may be.). Simone also nobly
tries to give some resolution to Knockout's clumsily handled death scene, though I wish more time could have been devoted to settling what was my favorite relationship in DC comics. Maybe more of that is coming. A girl can dream.

Buffy Season Eight #18 gets a B+ from AHR
Lesbian sex! Lesbian sex! All of these comics have lesbian sex! Not that I'm complaining. This is a really fun issue, and the future plotline gets more engaging as Buffy meets some sort of alternate version of herself. And of course we get a little more Dark Willow, and who doesn't love Dark Willow? Honestly. Next month's cover appears to be suitable for framing.

Sub-Mariner: The Depths #1 gets a B from Albo
Recasting Namor as mythological sea terror in an submarine horror story is a stroke of genius. The art from Esad Ribic is really something unique as well, giving a soft pastel cast to a dark tale. Could become a great series, we'll see about that second issue.

Fringe #1 gets a D from Albo
Bargh. What a schmuck I am. I see the word "Whedon" on the cover and I jump, thinking I'm snagging some underpublicized Joss Whedon-does-JJ Abrams brilliance. Instead it's not Joss but Zack that greets me with half of this dull rag. There are two stories here, both about mind-swapping. And... Well, yeah. It's a prequel for the show.

Marvel Apes #1 gets a D from Albo
Zombies these are not.

Panel Discussion: Scans From Robin #174, Amazing Spider-Man #560, The Initiative #13 and More

Every week we at Geekanerd rip panels from our comics and put them on display here, recognizing the best, worst, and weirdest moments of the week. Beware some major SPOILERS.

Click the pics for high res goodness!

Most Surprising Scene - Avengers: The Initiative #13
Despite the fact that no skin is shown and few sex acts take place, this is a boundary pushing sequence.

Here we have Emery, a nerdy, shy teen who happens to be indestructible, and a ex-villain who burns up anything she touches. Alone at an unauthorized Initiative beach party, she realizes that his powers would allow her to have sex with him. So she gets on him and starts, despite the fact that he's not into it. Is this rape? That's a yes. In a medium dominated by male sexual power fantasies, it's extremely surprising to see a scene in which a young man receives genuinely unwelcome sexual attention, and in a way that's not played for laughs or irony. Here the reader is made to feel the discomfort and confusion of this young man, and it's a powerful, sad moment. The last time I remember seeing anything like this in a comic is in Bomb Scare, a great Optic Nerve story. Here's to Christos Gage and Steve Uy for pulling off something truly unconventional in a mainstream book.

Pop Art, Stephanie Brown, Reed Richards: Ladies Man and more, after the jump...

The Reclamation of Pop Art - Amazing Spider-Man #560
The villain in this Spidey storyline is "Paper Doll," a 2D woman unhealthily obsessed with celebrity Bobby Carr. Her and Spidey have a dustup in a Pop Art gallery in this ish, which justifies the awesome cover with Paper Doll actually becoming Pop Art and creeping up on our hero (look at those nails! Creepy!). Later Spidey lands a well-placed punch in front of an explosive WHAAM! piece. Awesome!


The Power of Fans - Robin #174

Wow. Those who hated the way the War Games storyline ended have had just about all their demands met as of the end of last week's Robin. Let the retconning begin!

Exhibit A: Steph never got a memorial because Batman never really thought she was dead. This also explains his insensitive-even-for-him reaction to her death in the first place.

Exhibit B: Dr. Leslie Tompkins, heretofore believed to have actually allowed Steph to die as an outrageously irresponsible warning to teen superheroes across the nation, actually helped the poor girl fake her own death in order to start a new life.

Exhibit C: Editor Dan Didio is killed. Guess that ties up all the loose ends!

Smooth Operator - Reed Richards, Fantastic Four #557

Mr. Fantastic gets a bad rap sometimes for being cold and inattentive, but Mark Millar has a very different view of the smartest man on Earth. In fact, he writes him as a superbrained George Clooney. What a smoothie! Not to mention the fact that the location of their anniversary dinner is back in time for front row seats to when they first met.

Reputation Alert - Avengers: The Initiative #13
As seen in a previous issue of this series, Hank Pym's greatest fear is that he will be forever remembered not for his years of heroism, but for being a vile dirtbag who beat up his wife (BOOO!). He supposedly came to terms with that fear in that same issue, but now it looks like even the younger generation of heroes (who probably grew up on The Ultimates) aren't so forgiving. Sorry dirtbag!

Snap Judgments: Dead, She Said #1, Amazing Spider-Man #560 and More

Short comic reviews based on initial, lizard-brain opinions. There are probably some spoilers herein. Arranged from BEST to WORST.

Dead, She Said #1 gets an A from Albo
The more of Steve Niles' work I read the more I like the guy. I picked up 30 Days of Night when it was on the stands back in the day and came away feeling it was a little thin. But Simon Dark, among other things, has made me take another look. This horror noir story starts with a private dick waking up and cracking his way out of rigor mortis... That's right, he's "dead," shot through the belly and he's determined to figure out why. Giant ants may be involved. Smart, original, well worth your dollars.

Reviews for Amazing Spider-Man #560, Mighty Avengers #14, and Fantastic Four #557 after the jump!

The Amazing Spider-Man #560 gets a B from Albo
Not much more to say that I didn't say in last week's review of #559. Just a solid Spidey story from Dan Slott with killer art from Marcos Martin. We learn a little more about "Paper Doll" this week, and she's turning out to be a pretty cool villain. Different, at least. Also this ish contains the return of a major Spidey character we haven't seen since this whole Brand New Day stuff started...

The Mighty Avengers #14 gets a B from Albo
Frank Cho being so slow of an artist forced Bendis to approach his Avengers books in an interesting way--he was trying to thread the two books into one ongoing story, but since Mighty was taking so much longer than New he ended up creating a lot of flashback stories as filler for New in order to keep the books on roughly the same timeline. Well now that's become a real style of his, as most of his Secret Invasion tie-in stories skip around in time more than a season of LOST. I say it works, even if it does get a little tough to put all the pieces together in my head. This ish in particular is about how the Skrulls have approached the "problem" of the Sentry, and it's a testament to the new era of comics that their solution isn't just "hit him really hard," because as we (and they) know, that never works for the bad guys. Well, except maybe Doomsday.

Fantastic Four #557 gets a C from Albo
Ahem. To defeat a giant robot that pummeled every Marvel hero in existence and destroyed dozens of military complexes around the globe, Mister Fantastic builds a bigger robot (which he inexplicably dubs "Anti-Galactus"... wtf?) in an AFTERNOON and bases his whole battle strategy on the ASSUMPTION that the robot's creator included him in a list of people that it couldn't harm. When he could have, oh I don't know, CALLED HER JUST TO MAKE SURE. Lazy storytelling from a guy that's probably too busy out promoting the movie adaptation of Wanted to give a damn. On a positive note, there is a really sweet scene at the end (which I woulda given an "A" if it were a standalone story) where Reed takes Sue out on an anniversary date--back in time to the moment they first met. And as a gift he gets her a ring with a "stone" that's actually a micro-galaxy with "over forty trillion couples ... all loving each other like I love you." What kind of softy have I become when I open a comic and prefer the date scene to the giant freaking robot fight?! Am I losing my Geekanerd touch? Or is Millar just better with character moments than action?

Panel Discussion: Scans from Young Liars, Amazing Spider-Man

Every week we at Geekanerd rip panels from our comics and put them on display here, recognizing the best, worst, and weirdest moments of the week. Beware some SPOILERS!

Click the pics for high res goodness!

Beatdown of the Week - Young Liars #3
Little Sadie here apparently attended the Jason Bourne School of Resourceful Dustupping. Not only does she pull an IV out of her transsexual junkie friend and jam it in her attacker's eye....
...she then proceeds to squeeze the remaining contents of the IV bag into the guy's face! Holy crapsticks that is hardcore.

Hit the jump for the highs and lows of Amazing Spider-Man #559's art!

Art Worth Praising - Marcos Martin, Amazing Spider-Man #559
I praised Marcos Martin in my review of the book but I'm glad I get to do it with some visual reference now! You can see in this page how deceptively simple his linework is. It feels very spare and uncluttered, but really there is a high level of detail crammed into every inch. The panel-to-panel storytelling is especially great on this page. Martin tells a fun little story with all the details he's packing into Spidey's characterization: the subtle wringing of hands behind the back as he worries about being seen as a psycho, the contemplative hand on the chin in the next panel, and the resolute fist in palm at the end... You would know what was happening in this page even without word balloons, which is really as good as it gets.

One more thing I want to say about Martin's art in this issue of Amazing Spider-Man is that his sense of architecture is spectacular throughout the issue--so many comic artists draw cities as block after block of homogenous rectangle buildings, but Martin does a great job of keeping his setting just as varied as real world New York.

Also contributing to the great look of this issue is Javier Rodriguez on colors. He is a perfect compliment to Martin, with a coloring job every bit as subtle and smart as Martin's linework. EXCEPT...

(Mis)Adventures in Computer Coloring - Amazing Spider-Man #559
Yes, this is the third time I've gotten on this book for grievous misuses of Photoshop. What happened, Javier? Every other page of this book is beautiful, so why did you lose all sense of subtlety and restraint for the nightclub scene? It's so unpleasant I can only hope you were just trying to make a statement about how distasteful you find clubbing.

Panel Discussion: Scans from Wonder Woman #19, Fantastic Four #556, Young Liars #2 and More

Every week we at Geekanerd rip panels from our comics and put them on display here, recognizing the best, worst, and weirdest moments of the week. Beware some major SPOILERS.

Click the pics for high res goodness!

20% Percent Gratuity: Wonder Woman #19
AHR: Here is how I believe this panel came to be....imagine if you will a conversation between artist Bernard Chang and editor Matt Idelson...
"I'm supposed to set this conversation between two men in the shower, but I don't want it to be too homoerotic."
"No problem. Put a sultry naked woman in the foreground."
"....in the men's shower?"
"Military bases can have co-ed showers. Didn't you see Starship Troopers?"

Great art, bad art, an evil Russian girl and a compromising position after the jump!

WTF Happened? - Young Liars #2
Albo: One minute the girl is whispering in the guy's ear and the next she's getting the "protective friend" hand on her shoulder and our hero is getting flipped off. Did he somehow project his fantasy for the world to see? Surely he's not getting the finger because the tickets aren't his? And just what WOULD that girl do to see Spoon? Especially considering that the book is set in 2005 Austin, where Spoon lived and assumedly played pretty frequently.

Best Actor - Evil Russian Girl, BPRD 1942 #4
AHR: I think this character has a name, but I can't be bothered to look it up. All you need to know is she's an evil demon in the form of a Little Russian Girl, and she displays a wide range of both evil and childlike emotions...

Ironically framed innocence! "Who, me?"

A classic "bad cop" interrogation pose.

Sulking

Two more adult expressions. Take charge confidence and affronted annoyance; "who is this bitch and who does he think he's talking to?"

Art Worth Praising - Chris Bachalo, Amazing Spider-Man #556
Albo: What an awesome composition this panel is. The patterns in the floor and in Jameson's gown feel very Sienkiewiczian, the block of light keeps our attention well-focused, the restricted color palette works really well, and the top down perspective is just f-ing cool.
Oooh, what a bleak and stormy night it is! I know this doesn't seem that exceptional out of context, but the whole issue does a really wonderful job of isolating Spidey out in the cold. Bachalo doesn't use black borders around the panels, furthering the feeling of being surrounded on all sides by snow.

Best Comic Timing - Simon Dark #7
AHR: I think many other artists would have been content to simply repeat the first panel to convey an awkward moment of thought process in the second panel. The joke still would have worked, but the blank look away really sells the confusion.

(Mis)Adventures in Computer Coloring - Amazing Spider-Man #556Albo: Please click the image to get a high res glimpse. Now take a look at that image of earth. Get a bucket ready because if you don't vomit at the "I just pulled this lossy jpeg off Google image search" look of that crap then you aren't paying attention. This is the second time we've had to call out this book for crappy use of photos.

Anachronism Alert! - Young Liars #2
Albo: Going to play Guitar Hero, are you? Well I hope you have a time machine, because you're living in April 2005 and Guitar Hero doesn't come out until November 2005!

Product Placement Sucks - Fantastic Four #556
Albo: Marvel is the biggest product placement whore on the planet. I'll accept your intrusive ads if A) You lower the price of the books or B) You remove all other advertisements. Otherwise I can't help but feel like I'm getting ripped off. And for all you guys saying product placement adds realism to a book, please tell me what sort of self-respecting human wears a t-shirt advertising Guitar Hero III: Mobile?

Biggest Letdown - Bryan Hitch's Art, Fantastic Four #556
Albo: It feels like only yesterday I was praising the art in this book. I'm not sure what's happened in the meantime (I hope it's something joyous like Bryan Hitch having a baby and therefore no time for art) but this stuff has gone way downhill. What the F is wrong with Johnny Storm in this panel?! He's been up all night shagging some supervillain, so a little weariness is in order, but c'mon! He looks like a zombie Gary Busey!
Now this one I'm willing to exonerate Hitch for and blame on the colorist... This is supposed to be a pretty impressive splash. And it would be, if I could tell what the hell is going on. There's no focus, it's all terribly jumbled.

From A Certain Point of View - Fantastic Four #556
Albo: Alyssa on ground spread eagle? Check. Sue Storm's head positioned directly between Alyssa's thighs? Check. Alyssa drawing closer to Sue with lips parted and eyes closed?
Check.

WTF?